Everybody wants to be a winner, but few people are. Most people struggle to hold their little worlds together. Few people soar; few excel.

What is the difference? Are some people just brighter, more energetic, more attractive, more talented, and more athletic than others?

Even a superficial amount of research will quickly show you that none of these are important factors. Some people succeed despite a complete absence of any superior qualities while others fail despite an abundance of natural gifts and abilities.

Winning and losing are psychological drives; talents may or may not help; circumstances may or may not help; but the deciding factor is your psychology.

By psychology, I do not mean your history of experiences and how they have affected your relationship with the world.

I mean attitude or point-of-view.

All winners have two qualities in common.

They believe in something before the evidence for it has even got out of bed.

And they are totally committed.

That’s it. Master these two qualities and you will start to win in anything that you do.

Let’s tackle the first one: belief.

What is belief? It is thinking that something is possible when the evidence has not yet emerged to support it. It is holding a vision and sustaining it through sheer psychic force.

Some people can’t get to the envisioning state. They can’t form clear goals or shape ideals. Their attention is scattered and their sense of purpose is all over the place.

Others can get to the place where they can hold an ideal; but they can’t sustain it. They either feel that they don’t deserve it or that the means are not available.

Then there are those who can envision what they want and believe that they can have it. Even when they don’t know how, they are determined to find out how. These are the people who believe. And their belief creates the thoughts and actions that will lead to the creation of what they desire.

Something else happens, too. Their strong mental image sends out a ripple into the quantum field of all possibilities and they set up an invisible magnetic relationship, a resonance with their ideal. As they move toward their ideal, their ideal also starts to move toward them. The energy of belief is what sustains this relationship.

One more thing is needed: total commitment.

Belief is not enough; for at the slightest trace of defeat, the dream can be dropped.
Yet at the start of anything new, defeat is inevitable. You have to find out what does not work before you can hone in on what does. The right variables and the right pattern do not spontaneously emerge. A process of discovery has to take place. Traditionally, it has been referred to as trial and error. And you cannot have the trial without the error.

When the belief is damaged and collapses, then two things happen. The first is your momentum is lost, your forward movement toward your ideal. The second is your magnetic resonance, your relationship with the ideal, also collapses. You stop moving towards it. And it stops moving toward you.

Total commitment is what keeps belief alive. Anybody can be a champion in believing in themselves and their ability to attain their desires, but few are totally committed to sustaining that belief regardless of how circumstances are unfolding.

What prevents total commitment are what I call gaps. These are gaps in action and gaps in a positive projective thought. Our physical energy goes up and down, our thoughts waver from clear to confused, and our moods shift from high to low. All dips in the positive flow of energy are gaps. They are inevitable. However, when they become prolonged, that is when commitment weakens. If stretched out long enough, commitment collapses.

Thus, while there are many differences between winners and losers, taking care of just these two factors: belief and total commitment is enough to change the velocity of your life. These are the legs that you must stand on if you wish to shift your reality from a dismal, challenging one to a reality that is inspiring and a joy to live.

The psychology of the right attitude and sustained attention is what makes winning possible. Small shifts in your mind can create huge effects in your life.

Heartburn is due to irritation of the esophagus, the tube that leads from the mouth to the stomach. The stomach lining is usually protected from the effects of its own acid, but certain factors, such as smoking, caffeine, aspirin, and stress, can cause this protection to be lost and gastritis to occur. The esophagus is not protected against acid, and a back flow of acid from the stomach into the esophagus and notice the sour and stinging taste in your mouth. A hiatus hernia aggravates the problem.

Heartburn episodes tend to increase in frequency and severity as we get older. Normally there is a valve between the stomach and the esophagus that keeps the stomach acid where it should be and prevents it from regurgitating upward. If the acid does go up a little, the swallowing waver that continually goes down through the esophagus carries the acid back down to the stomach where it belongs. The valve is situated right at the diaphragm muscle also helps keep the valve closed. As we age, several of these mechanisms don’t work as well. The swallowing wave is somewhat weaker. The valve itself doesn’t close as tightly. Often there has been some widening of the space in the diaphragm so that part of the stomach actually goes above the diaphragm and the diaphragm cannot help keep the valve closed. Heartburn y itself is an uncomfortable rather than a severe problem. Home treatment will usually help quite a bit.

Avoid substances that aggravate the problem. The most common irritants are coffee, teas, alcohol, aspirin, and ibuprofen. The contribution of smoking or stress must be considered. Relief is often obtained with a frequent use of nonabsorbent antacids like Maalox, Mylanta, or Gelusil. Antacids should be used with caution by people with heart disease or high blood pressure because of their high salt content. Low-fat milk may be substituted for antacid, but it adds calories.

If your heartburn episodes occur at night when you are lying down, then you need to get gravity to help you rather than hurt you. Measures that help prevent the back flow of acids from the stomach into the esophagus should be employed. Avoid reclining for at least two hours after eating. Elevate the head of the bed with four-inch to six-inch blocks. Discontinue wearing tight-fitting clothes if applicable. Weight loss also helps decrease the pressure on the stomach. If the problem lasts for more than three days, call your doctor.

Human emotions are something that links every human together under one bubble of life. These emotions will range from love to fear, sadness to jealousy. When human emotions begin to take control of our lives, the time comes to take back that control. Jealousy, one of the most common emotions, can spring up without any precursor or visual reasoning. You may be jealous of your partner, brother, sister or friend and have no real understanding of why. Hypnotherapy can help bring the real reasons for this jealousy to the forefront of your mind and cure the green beasts hold on your psyche.

The imagination is at the heart of jealousy in most cases. The mind can be one of the strongest factors in our emotions. When the imagination takes reality and twists actions, thoughts and sayings into a world against you, jealousy often springs forth. When this imagination is paired with a self esteem issue or inner insecurity, the seed grows and becomes more and more controlling, until the jealous party can no longer control the feelings from within. Actions change, feelings change and life will be changed unless help is achieved.

Why Hypnotherapy Works

Due to the fact that jealousy is based in the mind as an insecurity, hypnotherapy can dig deep to find the core causative factors for the change in feeling. Along with the most core of issues, the surrounding physical and emotional short comings will also be considered as part of the reasoning behind the feelings being exposed. Once the hypnotherapist is able to centre on the causative feelings, those feelings can be changed and bettered through the act of positive reinforcement, positive thought exercises and auto suggestion.

Help For a Troubled Relationship

When jealousy rears its ugly head, the relationship you are a part of will often begin to waver. There is nothing quite as negative on a relationship as one partner feeling as though they can not trust the other partner in the relationship. But, with the help of hypnotherapy, these feelings can change more quickly than you could ever imagine. Within no time at all, the auto-suggestion and positive thinking exercises will eliminate your minds need to second guess every action and create subconscious meanings for everything your partner does on a daily basis. Being late from work, will not mean he or she is cheating. A quick at bed time will not signal the end of the relationship any longer. Your thought process will be moved from the imaginative and creative to the honest and earnest thanks to a totally natural and totally safe session of hypnotherapy.

Give Back to Yourself

Do not allow yourself another day of worrying, pacing and self mutilating. Life is worth so much more than the frustrations caused by jealousy. When it comes to making life better as two people in a relationship, the key is to find the heart of the problem, whether it be self esteem issues or past experiences and solve those problems from within the mind. Once you take that first step to recovery, you will notice the changes, your partner will notice the changes and you may just save your relationship and your self esteem.

Many people find that they are reluctant to trust hypnotherapy with their innermost problems. Hypnotherapy can make a world of difference in a very short period of time. Jealousy manifests itself based upon feelings. There are no physical problems, no medications that can cure the psyche with the same power as the suggestion techniques used with hypnotherapy. All it takes is a little time and a hypnotherapist who understands the importance of a strong relationship.

Born in Ankara in 1956, Adnan Oktar writes his books under the pen name of Harun Yahya. Ever since his university years, he has dedicated his life to telling of the existence and oneness of Almighty Allah, and to disseminating the moral values of the Qur’an. He has never wavered in the face of difficulties and despite oppression, still continues this intellectual struggle today exhibiting great patience and determination.

When Adnan Oktar entered Mimar Sinan University, it was under the influence of various illegal Marxist-communist organizations. Aggressive atheist and materialist trends predominated among students as well as the academic staff. Indeed, some members of the teaching staff would seize every opportunity to propagandize on behalf of materialist philosophy and Darwinism, even though these subjects had nothing to do with the curriculum.

This environment accorded religion and moral values no respect, and rejected them almost entirely. The materialist view predominated. But Adnan Oktar began telling those around him of the existence and oneness of Allah, and was the only person who prayed openly in the Molla Mosque, adjacent to the university.

At night-as his mother, Mediha Oktar, relates-Adnan Oktar would sleep only a few hours and spend the rest of his time reading, taking notes and writing. He read hundreds of works including those dealing with Marxism, Leninism, Maoism, communism and materialist philosophy, and carried out detailed studies of the classics as well as more seldom-read texts. He also performed wide-ranging research into the theory of evolution-the alleged scientific foundation of these ideologies. Oktar collected considerable quantities of documents and detailed information revealing the increasing dilemmas faced by these superstitious philosophies-their quandaries, contradictions and falsehoods, all based on a denial of Allah-and used his accumulated knowledge to invite people to reality and truth. He spoke to everyone, university students and staff alike, about the existence and oneness of Allah and the moral values of the Qur’an. In conversations at the university canteen, and in breaks between classes, he outlined the deceptions of materialism and Darwinism, citing direct quotations from these ideologies’ original texts.

Adnan Oktar attached special importance to refuting the theory of evolution. That was because he saw that ever since Darwinism’s first appearance, it had been subsumed by materialism and atheism. Aware that today, those same circles are still defending Darwinism and striving to keep it alive for ideological reasons, Adnan Oktar believes that eradicating Darwinism will hand those movements a major defeat.

The First Pamphlet to Deal Darwinism a Body Blow

To that end, Adnan Oktar concentrated on proving the invalidity of this deception that for more than a century had turned people away from religious moral values. He realized that since Darwinism advanced itself in the name of science, the most effective means of revealing its true face was through science itself. Based on that viewpoint, he brought out a pamphlet entitled The Theory of Evolution, a summary of his wide-ranging research and study, and personally bore all the printing costs by selling property inherited from his family, and distributed the pamphlet free of charge to other university students.

Using an accessible and comprehensible style, this pamphlet demonstrated that evolution was a deception, with no scientific validity. Many people who read the pamphlet and spoke with Adnan Oktar came to agree that no living thing could come into being by chance, and that Almighty Allah created the universe and all living things in it.

Nonetheless some students in the university, blindly devoted to materialist thought, continued in denial, despite having seen the clear truth. Some militant students openly threatened Oktar, saying his life would be in danger unless he ceased his activities. Yet this only increased Oktar’s determination and devotion to Allah. The harsh reactions and alarm evinced by materialist circles were significant proof that he was on the right path.

In a university in which terror ruled, dominated by atheist and materialist movements, devout individuals were harassed for their beliefs. During those years, while many young people in Turkey were ruthlessly slaughtered because of ideological tensions, Adnan Oktar openly preached the existence and oneness of Allah and of the truth of the Qur’an. In a university where no one had the courage to state his beliefs openly, he continued to pray regularly at the mosque, unwavering in the face of reactions and threats.

Spreading Religious Moral Values at Mimar Sinan University

When Adnan Oktar began communicating Islamic values, he was quite alone. For more than three years nobody at Mimar Sinan University backed up his views, yet that did not alter his determination. Knowing that Allah was his only friend, he did all these things solely to gain His approval.

He devoted all his time, energy and means to a single purpose: earning the good pleasure, mercy and Paradise of Allah, and telling all mankind about religious moral values.

In 1982, the first few students at Mimar Sinan University decided to support Adnan Oktar in his intellectual struggle. As months passed, the numbers of people adopting these ideas rose. Adnan Oktar held conversations with these young people on love of country; the importance of following in the great leader Ataturk’s path; the proofs of creation; the exemplary moral values of our Prophet (saas); the provisions and moral values revealed in the Qur’an by our Lord; and the invalidity of the then-prevailing ideologies of materialism, atheism and Darwinism. From this time onward, Adnan Oktar was a vehicle by which many people came to believe.

The First Smear Campaign and Torture in a Mental Hospital

His intellectual activities opposing materialism and atheism began to elicit reactions from wider circles. Certain groups, alarmed by Adnan Oktar’s nationalist and religious activities, set up a major conspiracy against him. Their plot coincided with the publication of his work Judaism and Freemasonry, which provoked an enormous response.

In the summer of 1986, Adnan Oktar was arrested for having stated, ” I am a member of the Turkish nation, and of the community of Ibrahim,” in an interview carried by a newspaper. Again under the influence of the circles mentioned above, misleading reports, false information and slanders about him began appearing in various publications.

Adnan Oktar was first arrested and imprisoned, then transferred to the Bakirkoy Mental Hospital on the grounds of being mentally unhealthy and placed under observation in ward 14A, poorly maintained, filthy, and used to house the most dangerous inmates. Ward 14A could be entered only by passing through a number of locked iron doors, since killings among patients were viewed as nothing out of the ordinary. Adnan Oktar was chained to his bed by his ankles for six weeks and forcibly given drugs blurring consciousness. Young colleagues who managed to visit him witnessed that he had lost none of his determination and enthusiasm. Postgraduate students, nurses and even doctors were prohibited from seeing him, out of concerns that he would turn them to Islamic moral values. Shortly afterwards, his family and relatives were also banned from visiting him, and even telephone calls were forbidden. He was threatened with spending the rest of his life in the hospital unless he abandoned his activities. Certain circles strongly suggested that if he ceased publication of Judaism and Freemasonry, he could immediately be released from hospital and spend the rest of his life in comfort. Financial incentives were also offered if he would hand over all the book’s research materials. But he rejected all these offers, refusing to bow to the threats and pressure that only enhanced his determination.

After Oktar had been detained for 19 months, the Prosecutor’s Office determined there was “no offence in the statements uttered.” He was declared innocent and released.

During this period, Oktar continued his work on revealing that Darwinism is a terrible deception. In 1986 he collected all his research on Darwinism’s true face in the book Living Things and Evolution, which for many years, remained the sole reference showing the scientific invalidity of the theory of evolution .

The Cocaine Conspiracy

Again in mid-1991, certain circles made uneasy by his cultural activities made him the target of a conspiracy. At the time, he was preparing a most important manuscript on the history of Freemasonry and world-wide Masonic organizations. Police, searching the home he shared with his mother in Istanbul’s Ortakoy district, discovered a packet of cocaine in the very first book they opened-in a library of some 2,000 books!

Adnan Oktar was immediately detained in Izmir where he was together with a few friends, then transferred to the Istanbul Security Directorate, and after 62 hours, was sent to the Forensic Medicine Institution for drug testing. It was announced that Adnan Oktar’s blood showed a high level of a cocaine by-product.

However, all the evidence submitted later showed that this was nothing more than slander; and that the cocaine allegedly found in Adnan Oktar’s library was part of this conspiracy. Shortly before the arrest, he had felt that secret moves against him were afoot. Leaving his home in Ortakoy he called his mother Mediha Oktar to warn her of a likely plot against him and asked her to clean and search his house with a few other people as witnesses. His mother called her neighbor and janitor, and together they cleaned her son’s home from top to bottom, dusting all the books in his library. Although Adnan Oktar did not return after that cleaning, 16 police officers carrying out the search operation “found” a packet of cocaine among his books as soon as they entered the house. The neighbor and janitor later made a sworn statement, saying jointly that “We cleaned Adnan Oktar’s library together, and there was no such packet there.”

The second phase of the conspiracy-the cocaine by-product in Adnan Oktar’s blood-was refuted by scientific and forensic evidence. Adnan Oktar was kept in the Security Headquarters for 62 hours before the analyses was performed. Scientifically, however, it can be calculated how much cocaine a man has taken and how many hours before by measuring the cocaine by-product in his blood. In Adnan Oktar’s blood, that level was so high that had he taken that much cocaine 62 hours before, it would have killed him. This showed that the cocaine had entered his body much sooner, by being mixed with his food while he was in detention.

This was confirmed by some 30 international forensic medicine institutions, including Scotland Yard. To the file sent to them for examination, all gave a common response: The cocaine had been administered while Adnan Oktar was in detention by being mixed with his food.

Subsequently, the Turkish Forensic Medicine Institution confirmed that the incident was a conspiracy, that the cocaine had been administered during the detention period, and Adnan Oktar was cleared by the court and released.

However, this incident revealed that forces hostile to Adnan Oktar intended to employ all kinds of dirty tricks. These forces, who previously sought to intimidate Adnan Oktar with prison and oppression, were now conspiring against him.

You can see the originals of some of the reports issued by health institutions proving that the cocaine entered Adnan Oktar’s body less than 62 hours before, in other words, while he was under detention.

1- Institute of Forensic Medicine of Munich University

2- Institute of Forensic Medicine of Aachen University

3- Turkish Ministry of Justice, Forensic Medicine Institution, 5th Specialist Board

4- Turkish Ministry of Justice, Forensic Medicine Institution

5- Grid Chart by Prof. John Ambre Used As One of the Main Reference Tools in Forensic Medicine Reports

6- Basel Police and Military Department, Forensic Medicine Laboratory

7- Institute of Forensic Medicine of Bonn Rheinischen Friedrich-Wilhelms University

8- French Interior Ministry Police Laboratory

9- Department of Forensic Medicine and Science, University of Glasgow

10- Institute of Forensic Medicine, Cerrahpasa Medical Faculty, Istanbul University

11- St. Gallen Cantonal Hospital, Institute for Forensic Medicine

12- Prof. Davide Ferrara of Padua University

13- Prof. Dr. H. W. Raudonat Center for Forensic Medicine

14- Institute of Forensic Medicine of Tbingen University

15- University of Parma, Faculty of Medicine and Surgery

16- Institute of Forensic Medicine of Vienna University

Adnan Oktar’s Work on His Books

After 1991 Adnan Oktar dedicated all his time to writing and spent all his time at home.

Under the pen name of Harun Yahya, he has written hundreds of valuable books. Those that presented scientific refutations of Darwinism provoked particularly strong reactions in the scientific world. The 22 April 2000 issue of New Scientist called Mr. Oktar an “international hero” for communicating the fact of creation over the fallacy of evolution. The author’s intellectual struggle against materialism and Darwinism has often been mentioned in such mainly evolutionist publications as National Geographic, Science, New Scientist and NSCE Reports. The English and German editions of National Geographic’s November, 2004 issue referred to his works concerning the fact of creation, and included the following quotation from The Evolution Deceit: “The theory of evolution is nothing but a deception imposed on us by the dominators of the world system.”

Adnan Oktar’s works have been translated into many languages, including English, French, German, Italian, Spanish, Portuguese, Urdu, Chinese, Arabic, Albanian, Russian, Serbo-Croat, Uigur, Indonesian, Azeri, Bengali, Bulgarian, Danish, Polish and Malay, and enjoy a world-wide readership in a great many countries, from India to America, Great Britain to Indonesia, from Poland to Bosnia, Spain and Brazil.

Through these books, a great many people have come to appreciate and to grow more deeply in their faith. Everyone who reads and studies his work is affected by this profound difference and benefits from his sincere, wise and easily accessible style. Each book is characterized by proven, definitive facts presented with honest clarity, which nobody can refute-features that doubtlessly stem from a striking wisdom vouchsafed by Allah.

Adnan Oktar Again Encounters Oppression

Various circles grew alarmed at all of his selfless activity. Unable to rebut Adnan Oktar’s works on an intellectual level, materialist and Masonic circles incited a slander campaign to prevent any scientific work that might undermine the theory of evolution, aiming to neutralize it through slander and imputation.

In November 1999, exactly when reports were circulating that his three-volume work Global Freemasonry, was about to be published, Adnan Oktar came under renewed pressure. The forces that had sought to hinder the spread of religious moral values with smears, plots, false reports and accusations ever since Adnan Oktar first embarked on his intellectual struggle, had again entered the picture.

As a result of their incitement and misinformation, on 12 November, 1999, police raided the homes and workplaces of members of the Science Research Foundation. They found no evidence of criminal activity, and observed no immoral activity. Nonetheless, day after day, the press ran unbelievable falsehoods and mutually contradictory slanders. As a result, Adnan Oktar was remanded to prison for nine months, in the absence of any legal evidence.

During all these trials, he has always constituted a role model maintaining his trust in, and submission to, Allah, recalling that throughout history, believers have all been tested with similar incidents, that every event takes place in a destiny determined by Allah, in a wise and auspicious manner. No matter what may befall them, he has always said that believers must always be moderate, joyfully determined, and submit to Allah’s will.

He has always been forgiving and compassionate towards those who have conspired to blacken his name with irrational and illogical slanders. Acting in the light of the morality revealed by Allah in the verse “Repel the bad with something better” (Surah Fussilat, 34), he was totally cleared by the court of all accusations made against him on 12 November, 1999. He is still actively engaged in his literary activities today, calling on his readers to live by proper moral values.

   The little steamer coughed its way round the headland, onto a narrow channel that opens out into the breathtaking Bay of Venice.  Spread out like a Caneletto painting.  To the left and right are the sea walls and artificail islands which protect the island/city from from the Adriatic sea especially when the Sirocco winds blow.

  It was mid-day and the sun was shining brilliantly; making us screw our eyes against its brightness.  But even the glare could not dampen our enthusiasm as we scrutinised the horizon, for what would be for many of us , our first glimpse of that fabulous city – The Queen of the Adriatic.

  The lagoon, itself, is lined with sleeper-like post sunk into the sea bed, separating the bay into lanes between which a multitude of small crafts navigate their way to and fro.  They ply their trade oblivious to, we, tourists casting us only a cursory glance.  After all Venice is home to them, and they have seen those like us many times before.

  Shimmering through the wavering illusion of the rising heat, the Doge’s Palace, immidiately comes into focus.  Its cappuccino coloured marble facade is like a jewel reflecting in the morning sun.  Then the magnificent Basilica of St. George is most recognisable, guarding the entrance to the Grand Canal itself.  It was built in the fifteen century in thanks-giving for the relief from a plague which had decimated the city.  Gondolas and ferry boats scurrying about like little ants, while cruize liners make one of their compulsory stops along side military vessels, all anchored well away from St. Mark’s square.  Along the landing stages tourist can be seen thronging the many stalls or surrounding the pavement artists or haggling with gondoliers, beside thier gently bobbing crafts.

  Leaving our ferry, we immidiatel head for the Doge’s palace, and of course the magnificent St. Mark’s square with equally famous bell tower.  The original towel collapsed many years ago but had to re-built.  Interuptions and distractions froliferate as we walk along the Riva Dei Sciavoni ( as the esplanade is called ).  It is our turn to accosted by the many stall holder,  as we wnd our way through the tight narrow streets, jam-packed with shops of all descriptions – shoppers paradise.  As we cross over the third bride we come to the infamous Bridge of Sighs.  It is reputed that over this small span, which links the Doge’s palace to the city prison, prisoners caught their last glimpse of the outside world before their incarceration.  In actual fact, very few people were ever sent to its sombre dungeons.  But legends are prompted by hearsay and so become fact. The Dode’s Palace, which is also the seat of government in the past and now, houses a fine museum and is worth a visit.

  Rounding the next corner we enter the main Piazza of St. Mark.  Our eyes dart about.  It is almost too much to take in.  On the left is the famous Cafe Florian with its open air orchestra inviting us to rest for a while and enjoy a coffee and cake.  Check the prices first.  To our right is the magnificent Basilica of St. Mark, its arched doors, and facade covered by exquiste mosaics.  Its cupolas and spires showing an oriental influence  from the city’s dealing in the spice trade, in days gone by when she ruled the eastern mediterranean.  On the veranda, above the doors, are the famous status of the four horses, once stolen by Napoleon when he conquered Venice;  but returned after his final defeat.

  Now the bell tower, standing like a solitary sentinel in the middle of the square imposing its Obelisk presence over the whole square.  A long wair and a long climb is rewarded by an enchanting view of Venice rooftops cobwebbed by the modern curse of TV ariels.  In the square itself tourists abound, feeding the pigeons and feeding themselves.  This is the haven of the alfresco diner.  The pigeon being the only hazard!

  To find the Rialto Bridge we are told to follow the arrows on the walls at each end of each street.  Ask for fuirther direction and you will be answered by almost any other language but Italian. The streets are now becoming very narrow; with shops, cafes and restaurants of every  description huddled to-gether with the tourists even squeezed closer to-gether.  Venice is not so big, and soon we push our way out of a side street and there before our eyes is the Rialto bridge.  It separates the Tourist Venice from the quieter side which is almost in a time warp. Once again, we stop and take in the scene.  Gondolas decked out with bunting; gondoliers in quasi sailor’s attire; ice cream parlours, the canal side cafes with the smell of fresh ground coffee percolating the air, bars offering cool beer to quench our warm parched throats.  A seat sounds delicious but unless youn really are tired try standing at the bar as the locals do; it is much cheaper. 

  Somewhat refreshed , we mount the bridge.  The bridge is flanked on either sides by a mass of shops and stalls; selling tourist items, jewelery, leather goods, fruit market and open air baking stalls.  And the big thrill is finding the smaller piazzas with its dominating church, walls adorned with frescos by some lesser known artists.  Walk on up to the top of Venice, where there is a railway station and  land bridge to the mainland.  We can now, catch a water bus and have leisurely sail back down the Grand Canal, wondering at the wealth there must have been in Venice by virtue of the magnificent palaces and Cathedrals that run along the canal banks.

Other attractions?  Well there are three main islands in the lagoon which you can visit by the water-bus service, or by one of the locally organised tours which are not too expensive and good value.

MURANO:- Where we can see the world renown glass blowers at work. You can buy direct from the factory shop.

BURANO:- Where local women can be seen sitting outside their homes, fashoning beautiful lace-work for sale.  And they don’t mind being watched as they work.

TORCELLO:- An abandoned island that was the first inhabited island to which the early Venitians fled  when the longobard invaders came after the fall of Rome. Once again abandoned because of the mosquitos in the island.  But one benefit of the war; the americans came and thanks to them the mararia mosquito was wiped out.The island is over a thousand years old and still has standing, a cathedral and a small museum with early Venitian artifacts.  It also boasts Cipriani’s restaurant which was visited by Winston Churchhill on one of his painting excursions.      

Whether you take a ferry, a glass-bottom boat, a Catamaran cruise with barbeque and champagne, or a thrilling power boat ride, you will be amazed by the views that sweep past your eyes as you pass by the craggy, pine-carpeted coastline that is northeast Spain’s Rugged Coast – the Costa Brava.

Every time we visit the Costa Brava, we can’t resist taking an exhilarating power boat trip. Join us!

Stomach somersaulting; heartbeat galloping; toes twitching. Excited and impassioned; eagerly anticipating the heart-in-mouth feeling: thirty minutes of utter bliss.

We are standing at the water’s edge, filtering sand through flip-flopped toes, hokey-kokeying in time with the gentle foaming waves. The vibrant orange boat is approaching: soon we’ll be clambering on and taking our places on one of the sun-warmed seats.

We flash a smile at each other. We know what is about to happen; we are energized by expectant emotions.

Wavering side to side, the boat gently moves outwards into the mouth of the rippling sapphire tinted sea. Slowly, the beachside chatter diminishes and the swash of the waves against the side of the boat takes over. There is a placid breeze fluffing up off the sea, drawing our gaze up to strands of wispy cloud suspended above the powerful stance of the castle walls. There is a moment of serenity, a haze of warmth calming our senses as if to give them a moment of rest before they are exposed to a rush of emotion.

Then, a tremendous roar, and like the jaws of a great lion, the engine opens and our breath is momentarily stolen as first our hearts, then our stomachs and finally the rest of us, are sucked away into the wonder that is a trip on this amazing speedboat.

Our emotions catch up with us as we leap and duck through waves and tackle a zealous sea breeze. We are smiling from ear to ear: we can’t explain why, but we are so happy. It’s a feeling of trepidation meets pleasure: we feel amazing, exhilarated; whilst in awe of our surroundings. The sea is a powerful machine which we learn to fear, but here we are, skimming its surface, with a guilty feeling of domination.

As the speed increases our pulses rise; our knuckles whiten as our grips tighten; now we are tilting on a hairpin bend and squealing our delight and encouragement to our captain, faster, faster we cry.

After a little while our bodies start to move naturally with the rise-and-fall rhythm of the waves; now we are willing the boat to accelerate its course. We are absorbing so much at this moment: whizzing past us are towering cliff faces, age-old and craggy, tenacious pines clinging to them; weathered rock formations jutting into the sea; historic caves where smugglers once secreted their contraband; secluded coves where calm turquoise waters lap the shore and snorklers delight at shoals of slinky fish and pulsating anemones.

We sweep round a furrowed bend, Whaaaheeeehhh!, we are clinging on as we tilt into the water and rapidly approach an opening in the rock – are we going to stop in time?

And then, total silence. The engine cuts to a soft hum and we are cruising into a shadowy cave. We listen to the cool water sloshing against the lower reaches of the chasm. On the craggy walls, shimmering copper and golden hues collide in the funnelled sunlight; a sparkling layer of rich amethyst coloured rock skirts the bottom; deeper into the cave an inner chasm is gulping down the water that is being pushed forward by the boat. 

We are being told a story about the history of the cave. We listen with interest as we are absorbed by tales of smugglers and teased by stories of lovers swimming to hidden beaches deep inside this intriguing cavern. Truth or tale we wonder.

Now we are back outside the cave and our eyes momentarily ache and squint as they adjust to the sunlight. Soon we are off again, making our way over the waves and on to the next delight of the rugged coast.

The wind is like a pair of hands ruffling our hair and the spattering waves are coating our lips in sweet-tasting salt. We turn to each other, laughing, excited. Where are we going next?

A sharp left turn finds us drifting into in a secluded bay. The water is so calm here it feels like we are being carried on the warm breeze. As we are drawn into the clutches of this pretty cove, our senses are stimulated in many ways: our eyes are graced with a kaleidoscope of green to blue and all the shades in between; the sun glints on the glass-like water creating sparks that look like darting fireflies. We hear laughter and idle chat muffled through the gently lapping waves, punctuated by the sound of a popping cork being sucked up into the pine-carpeted cliffs. A charming yacht is moored just off the bay and its immaculately dressed crew are on the deck, attending to a sizzling barbeque. The aroma of freshly caught fish, olive oil and garlic billows intro our nostrils and dances a jig across our taste buds. Now we are hungry, but it is time to leave this charming cove, whose beauty has left us feeling uplifted and serene, and continue our journey along this magical coast.

With a sound like shoes on shingle, the surface of the water is rasped as the boat coasts onwards past gnarled rocks and scoured crevices, all forming their own weathered characters. We all see different things: a long-nosed nobleman with a protruding chin; a fist clenched but for one spindly pointing finger; a great eagle with his wings draped either side, projecting its stocky neck and hooked beak into the water as if drinking from a pond; a dinosaur with its head extending inquisitively like it is foraging for food on the ground.

Soon we reach another bay and the boat is playing dodgems with moored fishing craft and buoys. The sunlight collapses behind the lofty rocks, forcing the water to reflect a different mix of colours. We are immersed in a powerful, concentrated green. The ultra-smooth surface is being sculpted into mounds and tufts so that it looks like a whipped meringue. We slice through the syrupy green water and as the beach draws nearer, the wall of rocks diminishes and the intensity of the green is sucked up by the re-appearing sun, leaving it like a glittering topaz gemstone.

Whilst we scoop up more thrill seekers from this beach, we peer over the edge of the boat and point and ooh and aah as a shoal of shimmering fish slink their way in and out of the bed of copper and amethyst coloured rocks on the bottom. As they move their graceful bodies, the sea weed starts to follow them, until it is hauled back to its suckered mooring on the rock.

Our newcomers take their seats on the boat and hold on tight as the engine revs and the beast takes to the waves once again.

Soon we are soaring out into an open expanse of sea, screaming with delight as our captain expertly slings the boat one way and then another. We’re cruising on the crest of a wave, almost airborne one second then coasting a hair’s breadth from the spume the next. Our sight-seeing tour has sadly come to an end and this is our final treat before we’re brought back to our senses, and the dry land that waved us off thirty minutes earlier.

What a way to see the Rugged Coast!

Common Symptoms of impending birth:

For a mare, all of the below signs are admittedly variable and only serve as a guide. Anyone who has dealt with horses will tell you that usually things don’t go as planned. Perhaps the mares haven’t read all the information available!

Two to Three Weeks Prior to Delivery:

Most mares display some enlargement of the udder and swelling towards the flank and belly.
Decreased activity.
Relaxation of the abdominal muscles.
Dropping of the abdomen and widening toward the lower flanks.

One to Two Weeks Prior to Delivery:

The area on each side of the tail softens and hollows.
The muscles and area lateral to the tail-head noticeably soften and relax in preparation for delivery.

Day of to One Week Prior to Delivery:

The mares milk sacks fill out at four to eight days prior to foaling
A clear, watery, or sticky secretion is present in the udder and at times is seen as a clear drop on the end of the teat maybe four to five days prior to foaling.
A cloudy color two days prior to delivery gives the appearance of wax on the nipple. This is commonly referred to as “waxing”.
Most foal births are between the hours of 9:00 PM and 6:00 AM and our foal as you’ll learn later on was delivered at approximately 10:51 PM on a full moon evening.

Delivering Our Foal:

What we have been told to expect and what really happened with Holli, was not the same. During her initial stage, our mare did often become uneasy, and restless. She paced the pasture and corral, would lie down, get up, nibble at her grain, surprisingly became standoffish, and she began to steer clear of us.

We were told that mild colic signs were common to watch for and it may or may not be accompanied by tail swishing. Holli’s tail moving exposing her vulva, sweating and/or frequent small amounts of urination. We had planned on cleaning the perineal area and wrapping her tail but as you’ll see further along, Holli did not do exactly what we had been instructed to look for.

Previously during Holli’s routine physical examination and vaccination, we observed that she would start to isolate herself from the other horses when she was in the pasture. Her isolation, we were told, could be another one of the many signs of a mare’s impending delivery. When she was checked, Holli’s vulva had slightly lengthened, her abdomen was beginning to drop slightly, and she began to show a noticeable decrease in her normal activities. She had not yet developed a relaxation of her tail head; we were looking for this area to feel like the consistency of jello.

After some discussion with other horse owners, we decided to begin watching her progress. With each morning and evening feeding, either Sharon or I would check Holli’s udder; there was only a mild enlargement, no waxing of the nipples, and when squeezed no evidence of streaming of milk. In retrospect, maybe a more experienced horse-owner may have seen that some of her outward signs were not strong enough for a novice (as us) to see but they were there and evident.

June 22nd was a warm, bright-sunny, clear blue-sky day and it was around mid-afternoon when I decided to leave the confines of my lazy chair and see to my girl. I arose from my comfort, grabbed my hat and gloves then ventured outside to the back deck. I stood for a little while and wondered what could I do and what would happen if Holli actually needed my help? Could I step up to the plate and make a difference and save her foal? I had always been told, as with my dogs and cats, to just let nature take control and if it is meant to be, it will be.

I went down the back steps, one by one, and started to walk across the backyard. As I came closer to the pasture, I paused and watched her actions, wondering to myself, when will you have your baby. I guess Sharon’s emotions and mine of watching a live birth of our first foal was on our minds or at least in our everyday thoughts. As I neared the gate, I paused momentarily to watch her walk then slowly prance around, nothing seemed out of the ordinary; she appeared to be just a horse playing in the pasture.

As I stepped through the gate, Holli stopped, turned her head towards me and stood there alone, watching my every step. Suddenly and being far from the other horses in the pasture, Holli’s head lowered to the ground, her front left hoof slammed down disturbing the grass and sand beneath. As I casually approached, I spoke softly called out her name “Holli, come here baby” after which she would normally turn and walk or sometimes even run directly to me. This time, however, she just deliberately turned her head away and began to step out walking along the fence line of the pasture. Holli maintained her distance from me of approximately twenty or so yards. This was a most unusual reaction from her and very much unlike what Holli would normally do when she and I were together. Holli was a very loving horse and always wanted a lot of physical attention. I decided at this point that I would do something different and what we’ve done with Jessi, in order to trick her into letting us get closer to her. I slowly raised and extended out my hand as though I had a horse treat that they had become accustomed to having when we did this hand gesture. She did not approach me but I continued to walk towards her and after fifteen minutes was able to reach her and I placed my hand on her halter. I gently began to rub her mane, stroked her back, then carefully moved my hand to the underside of her belly. She stood still and did not resist but turned head in my direction keeping a watchful eye on what I was doing. I worked my hand back to her udder; bent enough to look at her underside and saw there was no waxing over, filling of her milk sack or dripping of milk. From this exam, I slowly moved my hand up from her belly and across to her tail head. At this time, I gently lifted her tail and noted nothing different from the dozens of times we had done this exercise. I kept my hand rubbing her tail head for awhile and talked with her then left her still standing by the fence. What I did happen to notice is, that even with my walking away, she still had her head turned watching my every move and probably waiting to see what I was going to do next. I left the pasture through the same gate I entered, stopped and turned to see what Holli was doing. She still was standing in the same location I had left her, and sure enough, she was still watching me. I turned away from her and walked back to the house for another cup of coffee. I entered the house; got my copy then returned to comfort of my chair where I would jot down notes I had stored in my head on my visual and physical observations.

The early evening of June 22nd was a quiet warm night without the abundance of visible stars or the glow of the moon in the night’s sky. At this particular time, a slight overcast of clouds filled the skies, which would periodically allow the opening of a window to let the full moon rays to illuminate the pasture providing us a beautiful silhouette of our horses as they peacefully grazed. Sharon and I were both sitting on the back deck having yet another coffee and watching our horses at play, that is except for Holli, who was still standing off alone, keeping to herself. We both looked at one another and began our discussion on the pregnancy and when would she deliver? Would tonight be the night, was on both our minds. I told Sharon of the experience I had with Holli earlier that afternoon. Sharon said that maybe this is the beginning. We both looked at each other, shrugged our shoulders, nodded to each other then turned back to watch our horses. I’m sure that deep down inside, we were both hoping, anxious, and looking forward to the birth of our first foal, the first for our mini-horse ranch.

It was now nearing 10:30 PM and we both had sat long enough, watching, and waiting for any signs that the time was near. I was the first to stand, Sharon said that she’d thought it best if we move Holli into the foaling pen for the night, she’d feel more comfortable and at ease. I know now we had both anticipated facing another restless and sleepless night. Sharon went back into the house to make sure that all of the essentials were gathered for our foal birthing kit, turned on our local evening news and weather to find out what our area outlook was going to be for the remaindered of the night. I had already left the back deck and was headed for the hay barn for a bale of coastal hay. I planned on using this to lay down in the stall as bedding and use to fill the hay feeders.

There are kits available on the market that is equipped with the necessary times for foaling. What we did was talk with our vet to get the basic items that we would need for our foaling experience. All the items for your foaling kit listed below can be put into a clean, secure plastic container and left in your foaling barn or house. The bucket we used had a snap lid and handle making a nice foaling kit and easy to carry.

Items

Purpose

Flashlight & Batteries

Foals usually enter the world at night, so a flashlight will provide the necessary light.

Plastic Bag

To put placenta in and take to vet.

String

To tie off umbilical cord if it doesn’t break.

Scissors

To cut string, sac around foal, or tie off cord.

Iodine 7%

Pour iodine on the tip of the foal’s umbilical cord. This will help prevent infection.

Mild soap & warm water

To wash mare’s vulva and udders prior to foaling, if time permits.

Dry towels.

To pull out the foal, clean the foal, or mare.

Shoulder length gloves

To keep hands clean

Ace Wrap

To wrap mare’s tail prior to foaling.

Notepad & pencils

To record time, how foaling goes.

Halter & lead ropes

To move, tie or restrain mare, if necessary.

Clean bucket

To rinse hands, foal, mare.

Watch

To keep track of time.

Paper towels

To clean your mare, foal, and yourself.

Cordless or Cell phone

To call your vet in case of a problem.

It had only been a few minutes since Sharon and I sat on the back deck and planned moving Holli to the corral. It was nearing 10:40 PM and I had just placed several flakes of hay in the feeders and was now filling the watering trough. I had not yet placed remainder of the hay in the stall, this was to be my next chore, or as I thought it was too be. As I pulled the water hose from the trough, I just happened to turn and glance over to the pasture and caught a moonlit outline of Holli, standing just feet from the gate. She was pacing in a small tight circle, turning 360 degrees over and over, then she would stop, paw at the sand, then when cleared enough, and she dropped heavily to the ground, falling onto her right side.

I immediately dropped the watering hose and ran over to the gate. I guess my emotionally state and anticipation must have kicked into high gear as I was breathing a lot harder and could feel my blood pumping throughout my body. I’m sure that a lot of my inner feelings were that this was the time. I stood there at the gate almost paralyzed with my left hand tightly grasping at the latch, eagerly ready to enter, but instead paused, almost frozen, waiting to see whether this was the beginning of a new adventure. There, only ten feet away, Holli stayed lying on the ground for another two or three minutes before she stood and gained her composure.

I now had reservation on whether to enter or not, was this a false alarm, was I over-reacting, what should I do next. Well, Holli made the decision for me. She stood there, turned her head in my direction and just looked at me. I felt inside that she knew something was happening, but not sure what and was looking at me as if to say, I’m hurting, something is happening, help me. Several moments passed and she began to walk in another tight circle, pawed the same sand, and again dropped heavily to the ground. This time, I was standing so close I did notice her walk was more wavering, she seemed less sure of her footing, and the dropping to the ground was more powerful than before. I didn’t know what I could do; my mind drew a blank on what should I do next, what was I told to do, could I do everything right.

Again, it seemed like an eternity but one minute, when I snapped out of it and realized that this was the time we had been waiting so patiently for, our foal was on its way into our world. I remembered the vet and in my readings of many articles that this was a common action of a mare just before she would give birth. I released the latch from my grasp, turned to the house and immediately ran to let Sharon know the time was near, really near. I burst into the rear door, looked at the kitchen clock; 10:44 PM remember that. Sharon was sitting on the couch waiting for the 11:00 PM news and weather. I ran past asking where the delivery bucket was, “In the closet”, she replied. I said back in an excited tone, “Holli’s down and its time”. She jumped up, I grabbed the birthing bucket and we both bolted out the back door. I’m not sure whether or not either one of us touched any of the steps from the back deck, but I know she was right on my heels as we streaked across the back yard, heading for the pasture.

As we approached the gate, Holli was still down in the same place and position I had left her just minutes before. As we opened the gate and entered the field Holli began to rise. We both stopped dead in our tracks just feet from her and waited to see what she would do next. As for us, let’s just say that foaling time proved to be exciting, yet at the same time, very stressful. We both were extremely anxious for our new foal to come into our world. Well, as before, Holli circled, pawed and dropped like deadweight to the ground. I walked slowly behind Holli and continued to talk softly, as not to disturb or alarm her, then slowly reached down, lightly took hold of her tail and lifted it over her rump. After the release of a little fluid, her contractions became more powerful, and I noticed the vulva was opening and closing with each contraction.

She was fully dilated and Sharon and I both watched as the contractions occurred in rhythmic waves. They came and they went. Sharon looked at me and said, “Too late to move her now”, meaning she would not be brought into the foaling pen I was readying for her delivery. Remember this was our first foal and both Sharon and I were not sure of what Holli would do if we tried to get her up and move her. Would it cause complications? Would something be wrong with the foal? What if she couldn’t deliver the foal? When do I remove the sac or will Holli do that? Do we have everything I need in the bucket? Everything and many questions were being brought to light in both our minds and I know that we did a lot of shouting and probably ran around like children on a Christmas morning in anticipation of a specific wanted gift.

I told Sharon to stay there and watch her and I ran back to the house to get my cell phone and a flashlight in case we needed to call the vet or someone else for assistance and to use the light in case we needed to do so. Remarkably, in just my short absence, the contractions continued and it soon became apparent that this continued pressure was forcing the foal’s placenta through the cervix where it finally broke. Sharon told me as I returned that approximately 2 to 4 gallons of fluid spilled out of the Holli. This meant that the “breaking water” stage was over. I came back to Holli’s side and Sharon was still so filled with excitement of what had just happened and she witnessed. I guess looking back I was kind of jealous that Sharon had seen the beginning of a new addition to the ranch and I missed out for a cell phone. I recalled reading that after the water breaks, a semi-clear, white sac containing the foal will appear, ideally with the foal’s feet and nose first.

Holli was lying on her right side with her left leg drawn up towards her front legs. At this time, I moved over and knelt behind Holli, I reached down and again moved her tail away from her vulva and towards her rump. As active labor contractions continued, we observed the sac and feet of the foal become visible from the vulva. Then the sac and foal would retract back into the Holli and this continued for several minutes. With several stronger contractions the sac pushed further out exposing more of the foal’s legs with the foal’s nose tucked between the legs at the knee level. Then all of the sudden, it seemed as though something was wrong, the foal was not being delivered, had delivery been stalled, the foal was not coming out anymore. I made the decision to reach inside the vulva to check for any obstruction or turning of the rear legs. What I found was that the foal was hung up at its hip area. I slowly and gently stretched my fingertips to around the back of the foal’s hips and during one of Holli’s contractions applied slight pressure. The abdominal muscles and contractions worked together to deliver the foal within a couple of minutes. The whole delivery process began at around 10:44 PM and was completed by 11:08 PM.

I admit I was nervous that this had taken so long, but the foal was still inside the sac. I gently picked up the sac with foal, cradled it in my arms, and then placed it on my lap. I noticed the sac had not broken but could see the foal’s mouth inside opening and closing. I drew a complete blank of what to do next so I asked Sharon, “Should I break the sac?” Then I remembered what our vet had told us. When the foal is born make sure that the foal’s nostrils are clear so it can breathe. If needed, you can dry the foal with a towel, but Holli will most likely clean her foals. Treat foal’s umbilical stump with iodine for the first several days to prevent infection. Recalling these facts and before waiting for her answer, I placed my hands close to where I could see the foal’s mouth, I pinched the birth sac with my fingers and pulled my hands apart exposing the foal’s mouth and nostrils. Once the sac was drawn away from the foal’s mouth and nose I leaned forward and was ready for mouth to mouth, if needed. Then it happened the foal took its first breath. We just both stared and listened to our new foal taking in its first, second, third breath; it was going to be all right. I have to say that this was one of the most unbelievable experiences both of us has ever experienced and I’m sure we will both remember and cherish this moment. I was still holding the sac and slowly and gentle slid it down off the foal’s neck and over it’s front feet.

Holli remained lying down after delivery for about five to ten minutes. This allowed her to rest after such a big exertion but more important, allows transfer of placental blood to the foal before breaking the umbilical cord. To break the umbilical cord, Holli will stand which stretches the cord until it breaks free from the foal. At that time, we need to apply iodine to both the umbilical cord and the bottom of each it’s hoofs.

I did a visual exam of the vulva region of Holli post-foaling and checked to ensure that there where no lacerations or injuries caused by the delivery.

We watched the pushing out of the placenta and membranes that was accompanied by occasional cramping and these contractions lasted only minutes. We had been told that some mares may continue this for a few hours even after the membranes are on the ground, fortunately Holli and us did not have to experience this. The pushing out of the placenta and mucus membranes was the last stage of delivery. I gathered my twine and carefully began tying the membranes to the tail so the mare would not step on them when she began to stand. We were told that if the placental membranes are not expelled within two to three hours after foaling, veterinary assistance is needed for removal and/or medication. This is critically important and could affect the mare’s future breeding and fertility.

NOTE

: If veterinary assistance is needed, the mare can be walked which will delay the foaling process.

I conducted another vaginal exam after the placenta and membranes were completely out and hanging by the twine I had attached to Holli’s tail moments earlier. At close inspection, I was confident that it had not torn and no pieces were left inside. I untied the twine and picked up the membrane and placed everything into a five-gallon bucket. This I would take to the veterinarian for inspection the following day. The vet will ensure that everything is intact and that nothing was left inside the mare.

On later reflection, I now realize that there are many similarities to horse or human birth. I had been trained for humans birthing through the fire department, American Red Cross and military but used the same skills, even though Holli is still a horse.

In retrospect, I have theorized that perhaps a lot of nervousness that Jessi was displaying in the pasture over the last couple of days and Holli’s restlessness in the foaling pen was because Holli had always been kept in the pasture. This would account for her foaling in the large field as opposed to being moved to the foaling pen. As for Jessi our other mare, she may have sensed the upcoming event and wanted to be close by.

This whole book has been dedicated to our horses and donkeys and our first foaling experience. We had preconceived ideas about how everything would happen and from what others had told us. Nothing went according to our plans or was ideal for the situation. Although the outcome of this event of our horse ranch’s growth and our personal experiences was not what we had expected – the foal was healthy and a very sweet colt, later named Chief Squanto.

Are you one of those people struggling with weight loss? Nutrition is important, but one of the first things dieters try is some level of starvation. Unfortunately, starvation deprives the body of nutrition. Rather than triggering weight loss, starvation causes weight retention and weight gain.

How do you respond to your excess weight? Do you deprive yourself of food? Have you tried various fad diets or diet pills that claim to help you lose weight? Was exercise part of your weight loss plan?

If you have tried all these methods and you still haven’t lost weight, there is a good reason. There’s more to it than that.

Here are the elements you need to achieve weight loss:

- nutrition in sufficient quantities that do not include any fattening foods, junk food, sweet foods, and the like

- exercise to increase your body’s demands for energy

- breathing exercises to encourage weight loss

- consistency and persistence

You can’t expect to achieve weight loss if nutrition is not adequate. Junk food and other empty foods do nothing for you but add weight. While the energy they provide might make you feel good and help you to perform, they are short term solutions.

Let’s take a look at each aspect of weight loss.

Nutrition: You want to choose non-fattening foods that maintain the nutrient levels your body requires. If your body doesn’t get them, it will hold on to whatever food it gets as a survival tactic. Look for low and no-fat foods. Make sure you eat fresh fruits and vegetables, lean meat (preferably chicken or salmon rather than red meat), and calcium rich foods like cheese and skim milk.

Exercise: Develop a suitable workout for you and practice it at a minimum of 30 minutes per day. Make sure it’s an exercise you enjoy. Walking, swimming, cycling are all excellent exercises for weight loss. Nutritious snacks will provide you with appropriate energy that will quickly burn off during exercise.

Deep Breathing: Several times throughout the day, practice deep breathing for about 15 minutes each session. This will help your body to burn energy.

Consistency & Persistence: No weight loss, nutrition plan or exercise will help you to

lose weight if you don’t follow through consistently and with persistence. You might lose weight after your first week or two, but if you start wavering or skimping on your plan, or worse, cheating on your meals, you’ll stop losing. In fact, you’ll probably gain weight.

One final tip, eat 5-6 smaller meals throughout the day rather than 3 big meals, and avoid eating within four hours of your bedtime. You might already know that eating before going to bed can disrupt your sleep. In some people, it causes indigestion because the body slows at night.

Eating at this late hour can cause you to get improper sleep and it can cause you to gain weight.

Follow these tips for weight loss: nutrition and exercise according to your weight loss plan, and you’ll soon see results.

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Giving their customers a variety of window and wall treatments with their eco friendly shades and wall covering collections, American Blinds, Wallpaper and More provides a selection that not only helps save on home energy costs, but also aids in protecting the earth’s natural resources.

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If you are looking for information on 1 night stands or how to get someone in bed, look elsewhere. This is meant for people who understand the value of a true relationship and are in one that they may not be sure about anymore. Only you can come to this conclusion, but I hope this can help you reach the right one. I have been in relationships that were wrong for me but tried to hold on because I was in doubt, as well as helped others in similar situations. Who doesn’t love to meet their soul mate and have a happy relationship. It is one of the best feelings in the world. However, many people will stay in a toxic relationship rather than face being single. It is human nature to want to hold onto something familiar, even though many times you ignore common warning signs while doing so. The following are some signs I have noted in many relationships that are in their final days:

1.     You catch your partner lying. To me, this is the most dangerous one because lets be honest, how do you spend the rest of your life with and trust someone who you know has no problem lying to you. Communication and honesty are 2 building blocks of every successful relationship and trying to build one without them is the equivalent of building your house on a foundation of quicksand. Think about it, who wants to have to constantly figure out if their partner is lying. It puts you under a tremendous amount of stress.

2.     Feeling the need to “walk on eggshells.” This can come from a variety of things but usually is because your partner has a bad habit of seemingly looking for things to personally attack you on. They will take the tiniest detail or incident and bend and twist it and blow it out of proportion to make you feel guilty. Even when you try to smooth things over and apologize, often they will continue to give you the silent treatment or keep bringing it up rather than let it go. Face it, do you really want to have to deal with this kind of behavior the rest of your life? It is exhausting and frustrating.

3.     Your partner purposely says hurtful or insulting things to you then almost immediately apologizes, saying something like “I just couldn’t control/help myself, I’m so sorry.” Ok, everyone says things they wish they could take back at some point because nobody is perfect. I am referring to when this becomes a trend you notice over and over again. They do not want to accept responsibility for their actions and will blame everyone but themselves for it. The truth of the matter is, a genuine apology should be accompanied with actions. If they were truly sorry for their behavior they would not keep repeating it. Words mean nothing without actions to prove them.

4.     Absolutely any form of abuse. It does not matter if this is emotional or physical, it is a sign you need to get out of your relationship as soon as possible. Anyone who abuses you does not love you, and they are in need of mental help. Abuse is a way for them to make you feel weak and keep a stranglehold on you. Any time you try to speak up or voice yourself, they are quick to silence you with words or actions and make you feel worthless. This makes you feel like you have no right to discuss your feelings because of negative consequences that will follow. By using threats they can control you as long as you allow them to. Abusive people often exhibit abnormal jealousy toward your friends and family when there is nothing to be jealous of because deep down they are insecure and do not want you to break their hold on you.

5.     They begin talking about themselves excessively while completely ignoring you. Many times this is accompanied by a false sense of entitlement, double standards, a materialistic attitude, and vanity. These are the classic calling cards of a narcissistic person. They have no regard for your thoughts or feelings yet feel the entire world owes them something and revolves around them. They will often distort the truth or tell flat out lies about you to someone else making it appear as if everything is your fault in the relationship. If someone is extremely fickle they are terrible in relationships because they have no sense of loyalty to anyone but themselves. This only gets worse with time as they lose focus totally on you and “get bored.” In my experience, these people have very unrealistic expectations. They expect perfection, but it does not exist, so they are never satisfied.

6.     Everyone is telling you the relationship is a mistake, but you continue to rationalize your partner’s irrational behavior to your family and friends. This is a touchy subject because it can go both ways. You may come from a dysfunctional family or have friends who are dysfunctional and do not like your partner because s/he is a good guy/girl and they are jealous. I have seen that a few times in my experience. However, much of the time these people see things that you are blinded to because of your feelings toward your partner. This is one warning sign you really have to take some time out to research yourself and make sure you come to the right conclusion on because it is not an absolute but many times is a warning sign if you find yourself rationalizing bad behaviors by your partner.

7.     You have tried to break it off, but the person becomes hysterical, threatening, sometimes even threatens to kill themselves. This usually is accompanied by a promise of change, and the person will give you just enough change for a little while to get you back on their hook. People who do this are controlling manipulators. They appeal to your sympathy and try to get you to remember “the good times.” If someone continues to promise to change but does not come through on that promise, they simply will not. However, they know you well enough that they can continue to offer you just enough that you will consider not breaking up. This change is always short-lived, usually for a few weeks, sometimes as little as a few days, and they are right back to their old self again. This is a vicious cycle that will continue for as long as you allow it to. The only way out of it is to break it off for good no matter how much of a fight they put up or start kicking and screaming. If they do something irrational is it really your fault? Are you expected to just keep putting up with a relationship that is making you miserable? Suppose the worst does happen and they do actually go through with killing themselves (which usually does not happen). Is it really your fault? Are they your responsibility? Anyone with these kind of mood swings has mental issues that are out of your control. It is usually nothing more than another trick up their sleeve to keep you wavering and make you feel guilty.

8.     You find yourself living in the past when it comes to your relationship. Even though things aren’t going well and are dragging you down now, you remember the “good old times” and fantasize that someday if you continue to put up with this mess they will return. This is another misconception. In the initial stages of a relationship, both people are always on their best behavior. Many times people put up a false image of themselves that does not exist, and you actually fall in love with that image. It is the image you are thinking of when you remember the good times and memories. Most likely that person never actually existed; it was just a way to get you to fall hard for them. This is easier said than done, but you have to come to this conclusion and separate the image from the true person. The sooner you understand that the image was never actually legitimate, the easier it is to move on. You can not wait your whole life for a false image of someone to return. It is extremely difficult but possible with the right mindset and attitude to get past this.

Slam the door shut and stick to it!

So you think you have finally gotten up the nerve to end this toxic relationship once and for all? Great, but this is much easier said than done. However, if you keep your head up and your future in mind it is possible. The main thing is cutting off all contact with this person, NO EXCEPTIONS. Do not answer phone calls or text messages. Block emails, myspace profiles, instant messages, etc. If you leave the door open just a crack, they can get their foot in and force themselves back inside. You have to adjust to life without them and be serious about moving on. If you keep them around, they will surely keep you confused and doubting yourself. Don’t just shut the door, also paint over it and move the bookcase in front of it. Did I mention that if you crack that door just a bit to peek outside they will put their foot in and force it open with promises of change and a return to the “good old times.” Sooner or later you just have to face the facts and move on or stay miserable. The choice is solely yours, but you can not play both sides no matter how much you may want to. If you have an emotional attachment to someone, you can not be objective toward them because you see them through your emotions rather than logic. These points should help you stay focused enough to get the ball rolling on achieving this most unpleasant task.

1.     Remember this is for your own good. Often, controlling or manipulative people work at you so much that you begin to actually feel guilty and doubt yourself, falling right into their trap. Whenever you try to end the relationship you all of a sudden get cold feet and feel guilty, as if you let them down or are abandoning them when they need you. This leads to the wrong person ironically feeling the blame in a failed relationship rather than the person at fault.

2.     Do not believe their continued promises of change. How many times have they already promised the same thing, only to go right back to normal at the first sign of your accepting them back. If someone has tried to play the same trick on you 10 times, why will the 11th time be any different?

3.     In my experiences, most the time ex’s can not “be friends.” The exception to this rule is a relationship where both people mutually want it to end. That will work just fine if you want to be friends. However, when 1 person loves another and that love is not returned, any attempt at friendship will be awkward because deep down that person is still in love with you, not just viewing you as a friend. Many times, people will try to keep you around by using the “just friends” trick. It is seemingly harmless, but you will soon realize that it is just not working out like you thought it would.

4.     You can not “fix” this person. Only the individual can fix themselves. If they do not want to change, it will not happen no matter how much you try to force it. Do not beat yourself up over this and feel like you maybe could have done more and they would not be like this. Everyone makes their choices and must live with them. They are not your responsibility. You have your own life to focus on and keep in order, unless you want to take on a partner to babysit 24/7 or raise like a child.

Establish future boundaries, but make them reasonable.

So often people get completely jaded and bitter over a failed relationship. All this does is make you suffer even more. So you got taken advantage of? It happens to the best of us. Realize that you were not wrong to offer this person kindness and love, they were wrong to take advantage of you. Becoming bitter and saying things like “all men are pigs” or “all women are liars” will only keep you bitter and alone. However, some people when hurt choose to build up walls around themselves. The flaw in this action is that those walls serve two purposes, one that helps you but another that hurts you. They keep bad people out of your life, but on the flipside they prevent a potentially great partner from entering your life because you focus all your energy on trying to put up a front and act tough like nobody will ever get to you again. It is equally harmful to be completely vulnerable or to have impenetrable walls surrounding you, just in different ways. You should definitely learn from your experiences, though. If there were things your ex did that you would never tolerate in another person, be sure to make a note of them, perhaps even make a list of 5 or 10 things you feel that a potential partner for you must have. You want to have standards, just do not expect perfection out of anyone in the future because as human beings all of us are flawed. By expecting perfection, you will come up empty every time. Becoming bitter and self-absorbed is not the answer. As stated earlier, keep in mind you were not wrong for trying to be kind, forgiving, loving, accepting, and understanding. The person who took advantage of you was in the wrong. If you stop doing those things, that person wins in your life by preventing you from finding happiness as long as you stay bitter and self-absorbed with walls surrounding you.