OK, so maybe you hate optimists. You have this picture in your mind of someone mindlessly watching Pollyanna on the late show until three o’clock in the morning, then rising at 5:00 A.M. and singing “Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah” in the shower until the entire household is awake, causing a bad start to an otherwise perfectly OK day. A far more discerning look at optimists shows that they are life’s big winners. They are richer, more successful, healthier, do better in school, and have both better relationships and marriages. Linda S. Wilson, President Emerita of Radcliffe, says: “I’m an optimist. Optimism is the expectation that we can make things better. For example, in the face of pending illness, assume that it has the probability of coming out OK. It’s important not to have a defeatist attitude.” What’s different about optimists is that they are tough-minded and creative when faced with adversity. Optimism is high mental energy. Fran Shea, President of E! Entertainment, says: “I think optimism is something you have to put effort into. I’m optimistic by nature, but society is so sped up, and that contributes to the overwhelm mode. Not having time to prioritize works against optimism.”

CONVENTIONAL WISDOM: Optimists can’t handle reality.

THE REALITY OF SUCCESS: Optimists are the most skillful manipulators of reality.

The Reality of Optimism

Individuals who are more optimistic report themselves to be more alert, more proud, more enthusiastic, active, and engaged. These individuals are less likely to get depressed. Dr. Richard J. Davidson, Professor of Psychology and Psychiatry at the University of Wisconsin-Madium, has studied the biology of optimism and found optimists have higher levels of natural killer-cell activity with a smaller decline under stress, so they are more capable of fighting disease. Optimists also have lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol. All these observations add up to solid biological advantages that may help explain why optimists are generally so much more successful than pessimists.

Creating the Reality of Optimism

Much of what follows in this section is born of conversations with Professor Martin Seligman, Ph.D., author of the acclaimed bestseller Learned Optimism and the world’s leading authority on optimism, helplessness, and explanatory styles.

Overcoming helplessness

The number one stumbling block to reaching success for most people is that they do not genuinely believe that they can succeed. They have learned, over time, how to become helpless. This condition, which Dr. Seligman calls “learned helplessness,” is at the very heart of pessimism. We invent a million different excuses as to why we can’t do something — and you know what … as a result we can’t. The sad truth is that we are creating our own flawed destiny through pessimism. Dr. Seligman says pessimism is a self-fulfilling prophecy: “Twenty-five years of study have convinced me that if we habitually believe that misfortune is our fault, is enduring, and will undermine everything we do, more of it will befall us than if we believe otherwise.… If we are in the grip of this view, we will get depressed easily, we will accomplish less than our potential, and we will even get physically sick more often. Pessimistic prophecies are self-fulfilling.” Pessimists are more passive and less likely to take steps to avoid bad events and less likely to do anything to stop them once they start.

Who are you? Are you an optimist or a pessimist? Which category do you fall into? The typical pessimist believes that when something bad happens, it will last a long time, that the event has undermined everything he’s ever done, that it’s entirely Ills fault. The pessimist imagines the worst, is prone to depression, and generally feels helpless. The optimist believes that a bad event is temporary and surmountable, that it’s a cause of bad luck or other people. The optimist is unfazed by defeat and feels the bad event is a challenge to overcome. He or she easily regains energy and above all feels in control.

How you explain life’s events to yourself determines if you are an optimist or pessimist. For pessimists, those events are explained by Professor Seligman’s three “p’s” of pessimism.

PERMANENCE

Pessimists give up easily because they believe the situation is permanent. The bad events will continue and always be a part of their lives. An optimist believes the causes of bad events are temporary. Here’s an example you may find in your own relationships:

PESSIMIST: “You never talk to me:” OPTIMIST: “You haven’t talked to me lately.”

When things go wrong, everyone experiences a momentary sense of failure. How quickly you bounce back is reflective of this dimension of permanence.

PERVASIVENESS

Some people let failure pervade every aspect of their lives. If you lose your job, your role as a wife or a daughter or a volunteer has not diminished one bit. Dr. Seligman says it comes down to this: universal versus specific explanations. “People who make universal explanations for their failures give up on everything when a failure strikes in one area. People who make specific explanations may become helpless in that one part of their lives yet march stalwartly on in the others.”

PERSONALIZATION

Whom do you blame when something goes wrong? Those who internalize blame tend to have low self-esteem, feeling unloved or unworthy, while the opposite is true for those who place the blame outside themselves.

Becoming an optimist

This section will take you, step by step, toward being an optimist. The more optimistic you become, the more your mood will lift.

Becoming an optimist means learning a set of skills that help you to talk to yourself when you confront failure, a setback, or a tragedy. You’ll do that by changing the way you explain events to yourself. Technically, Dr. Seligman calls it the ABCDE (Adversity, Belief, Consequence, Disputation, Energization) method. Here’s an example of how to fight pessimistic thoughts by changing the way you explain bad events.

ADVERSITY

You’ve gotten up at the crack of dawn, made the beds, called two new clients, and are about to leave for work when your four-yearold flips his breakfast onto the floor. You totally lose it and scream at the little tyke, who gives you a look of bewilderment.

BELIEF

“I’m a lousy mother. I just can’t do it all. I’m providing a miserable example of how to behave and can’t even be nice to my own children. My children will grow up to be hostile people who deal with the world through the prism of anger and frustration. They’ll never amount to much of anything:”

CONSEQUENCE “I’m depressed.”

DISPUTATION

A good way to dispute any charge is to imagine that your worst enemy said that to you. You wouldn’t believe that you were a lousy mother and would argue the point SO, ARGUE! Like a lawyer launching an attack on a hostile witness, prepare the following arguments to counter your pessimistic thought.
— Make your belief factually incorrect with evidence. Look at all the evidence showing you that in fact you’re not a lousy mother — you take good care of your children, get them to school on time, read to them … you just had a bad moment.
— Decatastrophise the implications of the situation. OK, You yelled. Just how bad is that? Does that mean your child won’t graduate from Harvard or will become an ax murderer? Yelling once is just not a catastrophe.
— Search for alternative explanations for your behavior. Focus on the causes that are changeable, specific, and nonpersonal. For instance, you were up all night with a new baby and just felt a little cranky. That’s a long way from being a bad mother.
— Look at the usefulness of your belief. How useful or productive is it for you to think you’re a lousy mother? Does that really help you be a better mother? Often, it’s simply better to get on with what you have to do, to distract yourself, than to dwell on destructive beliefs.

We will continue the road on, Being an Optimist, next when we look at Energization and Immunization.

Dr Leo Kady

CAN PEOPLE REALLY CHANGE?

CREATING SOMETHING FROM NOTHING

MOST PEOPLE NEVER REALLY CHANGE

Sad, but true.

Some people never even try.

But those of us who do – and I assume that you are in that group – often experience great frustration and disappointment as we encounter the same limitations over and over again.

Life can start to seem downright repetitive.

CREATING SOMETHING FROM NOTHING

Why is it that in most cases your life keeps looking like some variation of whatever you’ve experienced before?

The answer is: because you are creating something from something. You’re attempting to create a new and different future based on the limitations of your past.

Imagine that you are a potter and you have a piece of clay. You can study your craft and make pots that are smoother, sturdier, or more beautiful than before. But when all is said and done, they’re still just clay pots.

Who says you have to be a potter? And who says you can only make things out of clay?

G-D CREATES SOMETHING FROM NOTHING

There is a fundamental kabbalistic principle of Creation known as ‘yesh m’ayin’ – something from nothing.

This principle explains that G-d is bringing the entire world, including you, into existence from absolute nothingness at every moment.

G-d didn’t create this world once and withdraw back into Heaven, where He supervises from a distance and intervenes when appropriate. Rather, He is actively and intentionally speaking the world into existence from nothing in the present moment, again and again and again. In fact, if G-d would stop creating this world – with all of its myriad details – at any moment, the world and everything in it would disappear as if it had never been.

Based on this, two things are clear:

1. The world has no existence outside of G-d. Everything we experience in life is part of G-d and His intention and purpose for Creation.

2. G-d desires the world – and you – with an intense and personal desire. Everything you do has great meaning and significance to Him. That’s why He keeps on creating you.

Remember those old commercials where a little kid said something like: “I must be good because G-d made me, and G-d doesn’t make junk”?

Actually, the truth is much more powerful than that. G-d doesn’t make anything or anyone without a profound purpose. He passionately desires you and just as passionately wants you to desire Him. And He is waiting — with bated breath — for you to embrace the Divine purpose for which you have been created. To make your life, your relationships and your circumstances a “dwelling place” for the Divine.

WHAT’S NOTHINGNESS?

G-d creates from Nothing because Nothingness, ayin, actually means absolute, infinite possibility. No limitations. No restrictions. None at all.

When you don’t need to be any particular something, you’re free to be anything. Kabbalah calls this infinite potential nothingness – not because there’s nothing there, but because there are absolutely no limitations that define or restrict this infinite possibility in any way.

YOU’RE ALREADY CREATING SOMETHING FROM NOTHING

As a human beings created in the image of G-d, you are also empowered to create something from nothing. And you do, all the time.

Unfortunately, most of the time what we create from nothing are the stories about what we can’t do, aren’t capable of, will never have – together with all the reasons why.

These stories are continuously being recreated from nothing in each of our lives. But unlike G-d, who creates consciously, we create this reality unconsciously. It’s a sort of default programming. Yes, I understand that you have reasons for what you believe, but those reasons, while they may help to explain your past, do not have the power to limit your future. Unless you think they do, and act accordingly.

Most of us don’t wake up in the morning in awe of our own potential, in touch with our Divine purpose, filled with the joy of life, ready to create. More often we wake up all-too-conscious of our limitations, our disappointments, our frustrations, our unfulfilled needs, and the burdensome problems we need to solve. No wonder so many of us are worn out before we even get out of bed.

HAROLD AND THE PURPLE CRAYON

You might have read a cute little children’s book called “Harold and the Purple Crayon”. In this book, Harold, a baby, draws things with his purple crayon on his bedroom walls. He draws things like castles, mountains, roads and tigers. The interesting part is that then Harold climbs the mountains, runs down the roads, explores the castles and runs away from the tigers. Sometimes he gets so far into the picture that he can’t figure out how to get home again – but then, he just takes his purple crayon and draws the road back.

Harold is always creating something from nothing.

YOU CAN CREATE SOMETHING FROM NOTHING TOO

Your life, your present and future, is actually an ayin – nothing. Yes, as a soul in a specific physical body, there are some limits to what you can create.

But you have no idea what they are.

- — Do you want to experience unconditional love? How would you behave if you were committed to love others unconditionally, especially those people who long for your love? Your parents. Your children. Your spouse. Your friends. What if you noticed, accepted and appreciated the way they love you – even if it doesn’t yet look exactly the way you want it to look?

What might happen today if you behaved that way? What if you stayed committed to that experience over time – what might happen to your most intimate relationships, your family, your community, your world? Don’t shortchange yourself by skipping over this question. Really think about it.

- — Do you want to experience your power to live as a creator rather than a victim in your life? How would you behave if you refused to let your fears and past failures put any limits on what you do right now?

What would you do that you’ve been putting off? What else? What might you actually create or achieve over time if you do those things? And perhaps even more important, what would life be like for you right now if you choose to be a person who isn’t stopped by fear?

Do you want to be more intimately in touch with your Creator and your Divine purpose? How would you behave if you were a person committed to seeing G-d’s intimate, infinite and loving presence in all aspects of your life? What if every action you take was based on the assumption that nothing is wrong – because G-d is intentionally, creating your world right now on behalf of your ultimate purpose and fulfillment?

What might your life be like – today – if you behaved that way? How about your relationships? Your energy? Your happiness? Your peace of mind?

HOW TO CREATE MIRACLES

Like a farmer who tills his field, plants seeds, waters and tends them, sometimes it can take time to see the results of your efforts. But if you are willing to create something from nothing, you don’t have to twiddle your thumbs while you wait for things to grow. The very decision to be a creator in your own life brings with it some powerful, intrinsic rewards; rewards like joy, fulfillment — and miracles.

© Shifra Hendrie, Kabbalah of Transformation / www.kabbalahoftransformation.com.

*Since the Torah forbids the erasing of G-d’s name, it’s customary to avoid writing it out in full.

Copyright © 2007 Ed Bagley

Nanny McPhee — 4 Stars (Excellent

Bless yourself by renting “Nanny McPhee” and sharing it with your children at home, not in the movie theater. Do this because this film is all about home and your children might relate better in the comfort of their own home. Nanny McPhee is an excellent film with a wonderful message for all children to recognize and understand.

In an entertainment world full of trashy and violent video games with movies to match that dwell on murder, rape, sex, drugs, alcohol, filthy language, broken relationships and crummy morals, Nanny McPhee is everything good about movies for children. You and your children can watch this film without fear of unpleasant and unwanted garbage rooted in sensationalism for ratings and greed.

When finished watching, you can thank the uncompromising excellence of British actress Emma Thompson and British director Kirk Jones for the incredible excellence of Nanny McPhee. I watched this film and went to bed wondering if it was as good as I thought it was. I watched it again the next night and did not wonder again.

Thompson-who has won 2 Academy Awards for Best Actress (Howards End in 1992) and Best Adapted Screenplay (Sense and Sensibility in 1995), and 2 BAFTAs for Best Actress (Howards End and Sense and Sensibility)-wrote the screenplay for Nanny McPhee. BAFTA is the equivalent of the American Oscars, the British Academy of Film and Television Arts.

Kirk Jones (not to be confused with the American rapper and actor Kirk Jones) is a gifted writer and director with great work that has not been properly recognized. Combine Emma Thompson with Kirk Jones and you have the formula for a winning production.

In 1998 Jones wrote and directed his first feature film “Waking Ned Devine” with a budget of $3 million that grossed $90 million worldwide. I believe Jones should have two Oscars and probably would if it were not for the fact that Hollywood’s voters are too busy pawing each other and posing for pictures to correct their near-sightedness.

Until a comedy is made that is better than Waking Ned Devine it shall remain my favorite comedy of all time.

If it sounds like I am gushing over Nanny McPhee, I am. There are so many good lines in this script I would not dare to recount them here. Watch the movie and enjoy the experience of listening carefully.

Nanny McPhee the movie is named for a governess (Emma Thompson) who uses magic to rein in the behavior of 7 out-of-control children of recently widowed Mr. Brown (Colin Firth).

Mr. Brown must answer to his Aunt Adelaide (Angela Lansbury) who has been financing his family’s livelihood and now commands him to marry within the month or she will cut off his sustenance. His bratty children have a genuine fear of losing their father should he marry the widowed Mrs. Quickly (Celia Imrie).

The children, who collectively have driven away 17 consecutive nannies, are led by their older brother Simon (Thomas Sangster). All 6 of the younger children-Tora (Eliza Bennett), Lily (Jennifer Rae Daykin), Eric (Raphael Coleman), Sebastian (Samuel Honywood), Christianna (Holly Gibbs) and Baby Agatha (Hebe Barnes and Zinnia Barnes)-face the same fate as Simon.

Enter Nanny McPhee with her magic and old-fashioned discipline that makes the children aware of their behavior, and soon the children become models of what to do and when to do it.

Beyond the obvious endearments, what makes this film excellent is two huge but subtle elements.

One is the guts of the writer and actress Emma Thompson who creates a character for herself that is repugnant upon first sight. She has two huge warts on her face and an enormous tooth cascading down over her lower lip. Nanny McPhee will repel you upon first look. Thompson’s acting skills allow her to be perfectly relaxed and confident despite her appearance. Her make-up was done by designer Peter King.

The other element is the discovery by the children that when they learn a major lesson, one of the warts disappears, and eventually through model behavior by the children, Nanny McPhee becomes better and better looking.

In many such films as this-the “Sound of Music” with Julie Andrews comes to mind-the nanny only influences the children. In Nanny McPhee, the children also become powerful agents for positive change, empowering them in the process. Never underestimate the insight and brilliance of Emma Thompson, the writer or actress.

A tip of the hat to Angela Lansbury in her role as well. Lansbury is a living legend who never goes out of character as Aunt Adelaide. From Broadway to Hollywood to television and back, Angela Lansbury is a British national treasure.

Nanny McPhee is based on the “Nurse Matilda” books by Christianna Brand. Emma Thompson said it took her 9 years to write the screenplay; it took her 5 years to write her Oscar-winning Sense and Sensibility.

Trust me when I say that Nanny McPhee was worth the wait and then some. Watch Nanny McPhee and learn with your children some important lessons in human nature.

Mindfulness is being aware of yourself, others, and your surroundings in the moment. Well-known mindfulness teacher, Jon Kabat-Zinn, defines it this way Mindfulness means paying attention in a particular way; on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally. I also like to think of mindfulness as the art of inhabiting your own life with kindness and acceptance.

When first entertaining the idea of practicing mindfulness in a conscious, committed way, I had mixed feelings. On the one hand, I absolutely believed that I would love the peace of mind and sense of balance that those who practiced mindfulness seemed to enjoy. On the other hand, I groaned inwardly at the thought of adding yet another guilt-inducing “should” to an already full schedule. Two different things tempered my concerns and helped me make a wholehearted commitment to the practice of mindfulness. One was noticing how calm, accepting, and humorous people were whom I knew practiced mindfulness regularly. I wanted more of that appealing equanimity and joy. The other realization was a semi-embarrassing “Duh!” Instead of making mindfulness a guilt-inducing chore, I could simply choose to make practicing mindfulness a joy and celebrate each small step taken.

Because my goal in personal practice is to create a guilt-free and supportive atmosphere, I’ve adopted the adage A few mindful moments make a world of difference as my motto. And a few mindful moments do make a world of difference. Probably, we can all summon memories of experiences that are branded indelibly in our minds and hearts. They may be as simple as watching the moon rise or as miraculous as being at a baby’s birth. Remembering such things can feel as if we’re having the experience all over again. We can actually embody the same physical feelings, or the deep sense of awe and mystery, that were present at the actual event. But why do these particular memories stick with us in such vivid detail while so many others fade into oblivion? What do these indelible memories have in common? We paid attention when the original events were happening. Our brains, hearts, and minds where present during the experience, not projected into the future or ruminating in the past. We were there, alive and receptive, fully inhabiting our lives in that moment.

As parents, anyone who has been in an intimate relationship, and even animal trainers know, you get more cooperation and a better response from others by accentuating and appreciating acceptable behaviors than you do by emphasizing and berating undesirable ones. In other words, we catch more bees by using the honey of kindness and approval than we do by wielding the bludgeon of guilt. The same is true of your relationship with yourself. Energy and enthusiasm flow where your attention goes. Therefore, in keeping with my guilt-free motto, I try not to dwell on how few mindful minutes I may have had so far today; but, rather, gently remind myself to become more mindful right now. It can also be helpful to revisit mindful moments at the end of the day and congratulate yourself on your expanding awareness. Affirming even what may seem the smallest of successes encourages you to continue practicing mindfulness one tiny little moment at a time.

The following practice helps me begin and end the day with a few mindful moments.

Practice …

Wake up to breath …

Before getting out of bed in the morning, tune into your breath and simply be aware of it without trying to change it. Do this for five or six breaths.

Express gratitude for at least two things. For instance, waking up to another day, sleeping as well as you did, or for a dream you remember.

Set an intention for the day. For example, “Today I will practice kindness.” “Today, I will eat in a healthy way.” or “I will give each of the kids five minutes of undivided attention today.”

Rest in breath …

Before going to sleep at night, turn your attention to your breath. Rest in it quietly for several effortless inhalations and exhalations.

Review and relive mindful moments experienced during the day. Thank yourself for being aware and present. Think about constructive choices you made and congratulate yourself for making them.

Ask to be protected as you sleep.

Each mindful moment remembered and celebrated makes a world of difference in our willingness to continue practicing.

Well-known mindfulness teacher, Pema Chodron says, Compassion for others begins with kindness to ourselves. One of the wonderful things about adopting a guilt– free attitude toward our mindfulness practices in particular, and ourselves in general, is that our personal outlooks are effected. When not carrying a self-induced burden of guilt, our hearts can open more fully and, as a result, shower compassion and kindness on both ourselves and others.

Practice mindfulness

With commitment, not pressure

Feel heart opening.

Copyright © 2008 Sue Patton Thoele

Author

Sue Patton Thoele is a psychotherapist, former hospice chaplain, and bereavement group leader. She is author of The Mindful Woman: Gentle Practices for Restoring Calm, Finding Balance & Opening Your Heart and eleven other books, including The Courage To Be Yourself, The Woman’s Book of Soul, Growing Hope, Freedoms After 50, and The Woman’s Book of Courage. Sue and her husband, Gene, live in Colorado near their adult children and grandchildren.

Let’s get real. Forget all the Gobbledegook about foreign oil fields peaking and the rapid increase in worldwide consumption…

1. Oil production in Saudi Arabia, Iran, Iraq, Venezuela, Mexico, Russia, HAS either peaked, or it has NOT peaked. (Consider that each of those countries have poor records in the benevolent treatment of their own people — so why should their attitude toward anyone else be different? I’m saying that you are not going to get the truth about how much oil any or them have left in the ground, or how much oil they are capable of producing over any given period of time. Nor do these producing countries give a hoot about your creature comforts or the harmful effects to your pocketbook)

2. Indonesian oil has undoubtedly peaked. OPEC has just kicked them out of its organization as a “producer.” They are now a net importer — a once stellar producer, reduced to beggaring for their oil…a bit like you and me.

3. Brazil, in addition to refining ethanol from sugar-cane, has a major off-shore discovery called Tupi. It’s huge (50 billion barrels of crude). It’s deep, 2 miles down and locked in rock. With oil at $138 a barrel, the 100 billion dollar financing to extract it will be forthcoming. It won’t come cheap.

4. Russian Oil and gas, plenty of it at the moment, but they don’t love us any more than the Arabs do. And the Russian record for loyalty, truth, and fair play is about as dim as anyone’s. Forget them as a dependable supply source.

5. It’s a given that India and China import nearly all their oil needs and currently have an increasing demand spurred on by a 2 billion+ citizenry.

6. Bakken, on U.S. soil in South Dakota, is 2 miles deep and locked in thin layers of dolomite. At 413 billion barrels, it is potentially larger than the Saudi Ghawar field. Horizontal fracking of the complex layers of rock to release the petroleum will definitely make it expensive. Soaring oil prices are pushing this field toward a development consideration. Again, this oil won’t be cheap.

7. How much faith do you have in U.S. oil companies giving you the honest truth about anything, yet oil production and consumption statistics? If you are anything like men — ZILCH!

Now let’s turn over, in our numbed minds, a few simple thoughts regarding oil and our daily lives here in these great United States of America.

1. Why are pump prices, state to state, pump to pump, varying only a penny or so — one from the other? (Can you remember a time when there was a free market in gasoline…when there were gas wars and bargains to behold, gas station to gas station? Believe it or not, when I was a kid, that was a fact.)

The U.S. Congress will solve the problem.

2. Did you watch the recent Congressional charade, wherein oil company execs were interrogated, presumedly, by their own loyal subjects? (You will be pardoned for the suspicion that nearly every Congressman profits from gifts dispensed by oil industry lobbyists and/or contributions to their PACs.)

3. Did you hear Congress raise a hue and cry about SUING SAUDI ARABIA for withholding oil production? Yes? And last week, Congress was going to get to the bottom of Oil Speculation…those horrid “speculators” who have been driving oil prices higher…

Isn’t it wonderful that oil prices promptly dropped — dignifying Congress. I retired to my bed, pleased and eased. At last, lower oil prices! Hmm…just give the oil boys a day or two.…

Okay, while we are individually suffering a collapse of housing prices, along with our family budgets, the big oil companies are making BILLIONS and BILLIONS in obscene (reportable) profits. How much more are they hiding?

Hunnh?..

1. Where is Congress on that one? Why are we accumulating horrendous personal and national debts, while big oil companies are allowed to pile up unconscionable profits?

(Oh, yes… Now I recall — it’s the NIMBY tree huggers. They’ve stopped all the new refineries from being built, all the offshore drilling from going ahead.)

How about a national energy policy?

1. Hunnh?… We have one — ethanol. It’s a dandy…costing more in fuel to cook up a gallon of ethanol than it saves by burning in your car’s engine. It throws carbon into the atmosphere during its manufacture and provides less mileage per gallon than a gallon of diesel or gasoline. Worst of all, it has thrown many square miles of Midwest ag. land out of soybean and grain production (in favor of corn for ethanol production) thus creating a monumental shortage of corn for animal feed, raising chicken and beef prices. And the lost acreage shrinks grain production, raising bread and cereal prices in the grocery store.

And just to make sure none of that cheap Brazilian ($40/barrel) sugar-cane ethanol gets to our shores, Congress slapped a 54 cent/a/gallon tariff on it some time ago in a U.S. farm bill…note that the cast-off sugar cane stalks feed Brazilian electric power plants.

Dwell with me a bit longer on our (invisible) national energy policy. And forget about drilling up more oil. (Let’s assume the oil industry is hastening its own demise.)

2. Nuclear fuel (Uranium) is cheap and mineable in the USA and Canada. Consider that 80% of French electric production is nuclear, and, so far, no accidents. Why haven’t we moved ahead with more nuclear (no atmospheric pollution) electric production? It’s tree huggers and Greenpeace, they tell us…

3. Why have we neglected public Bus, Trolley, and Train transportation?

.(See Japan for countrywide 200 mph trains.)

4. The other night on TV, I observed a $27,000 bug-like car that provably carried two people 300 miles on ONE gallon of gas, at speeds up to 90 miles an hour and had amazing acceleration from a standing start.

DETROIT, WHERE CAN YOU BE?
(Too busy building Hummers…)

5. Hats off to those busy Detroiters who, over the years, bought up patents that would advance more fuel-efficient carburation and develop super-storage batteries for electric cars — then sat on those patents.

6. How about converting natural gas to fuel — why is that industry invisible?

7. Coal gasification and coal-to-fuel? The Chinese are into it. The Germans fueled their WWII effort with petroleum extracted from coal.

On nightly TV, you can observe a major industry disappearing before your very eyes:

THE AIRLINES…

1. Loose regulation paves the way for chaotic conditions at understaffed flight control centers and airport control towers. Too many new carriers; too many scheduled flights; ramp accidents and mid-air near misses.

2. Free food is reduced to snacks; seating jammed to the max. Nonetheless, public rushes to book cheap flights — bound for every spot on the globe.

3. Loose regulation of maintenance procedures raises few questions. Aircraft and airframe safety quietly, but steadily, nosedives.

4. Annual fuel costs jump to an industry-wide $65 billion, squeezing profits and tripling fares; passengers hesitate. Airlines fight back, cutting out snacks, charging for baggage, on-the-spot canceling of flights not filled. Passengers search web for last minute price cuts as lines try to fill seats 100%; arrive at airport to find seat and flight canceled — line just declared bankruptcy. No one wants to hear about the wheel that fell off your baby stroller…customer rage. Sour counter people. Smoldering pilots and crews…

At the risk of running you off the far end of the runway — a final blast… Have we, in America, been put totally to sleep by the hucksters of Madison Avenue?

In the 1950’s, Madison Avenue was held in the kind of awe later directed toward Silicon Valley and our various bubbles — technology, housing, and, most recently, commodities. Lusting for financial gain, we’ve ignored the transference of advertising industry wiles to corporations, Washington think tanks, lobbyist groups, Congress — permeating even the inner circles of White House administrations… absorbed so beautifully that we’ve been totally rocked to sleep in comfortable cradles of SPIN.

Is it possible our leaders have blinded themselves with their own spin? Twin emergencies now upon us — energy and credit. Busy coddling one industry after another, our leaders have blatantly ignored preparations to combat these crises.

“Industry will govern itself perfectly,” has been the cry of the regulators, letting foxes guard the chicken house. And the results: Bear Stearns; the mess at the gas pump; the airline chaos; the sub-prime housing and credit collapse, with its ugly offshoot — the yet-to-be felt trillion dollar, derivative phantasia.

Why don’t we, ALL OF US, take TWO weeks off from work? Stop driving! Stop flying! Stop shopping! Live on what you have in the cupboard…take a walk around your community… shake hands with the neighbors… go to your church or temple and volunteer for three days of something that will benefit anyone but yourself. HOW BAD COULD THAT BE, IF WE ALL DECLARE ALLEGIANCE TO ONE ANOTHER, OUR FLAG, AND OUR COUNTRY? (Don’t forget, we have boys and girls in Iraq doing that very thing…)

Before they’re pregnant, many women think they’ll take ‘the soft option’ and have a caesarean.  Then they become pregnant and their hormones do somersaults.  They read some more about caesareans and realize that maybe they aren’t the soft option they’d thought, either for themselves or their babies, and it dawns on them that there’s only one way out, and people say it’s painful. 

The other thing that happens when you’re pregnant is that people immediately feel entitled to express an opinion and give you advice.  You are inundated with horror stories about other people’s labours, or other people’s wives’ labours, or other people’s sister’s labours, etc. etc. etc.  Somewhere along the line somebody mentions that their sister’s cousin’s mother-in-law’s step-daughter did this thing called hypno birthing and she raved about it.  So you go home and google it.  This is how it all began.

At the beginning of the last century there was a young obstetrician, Grantly Dick-Reed working at the London Hospital in Whitechapel.  This was the area of the docks, which was the poorest slum area of London, at a time when only people who could afford to pay could go to hospital. 

One night, Dick-Reed was called out to attend a home delivery.  It was in such a poor dwelling that there was water dripping through the roof and no money for a bed or blankets.  When he got there, he offered the woman chloroform for pain relief, but she waved him away.  Much to his credit he stood back and watched as she gave birth naturally and easily with no drugs and no pain.  He asked her why she had refused pain relief, as this was completely outside his experience, and she simply said to him:  “It didn’t hurt.  It wasn’t meant to, was it, Doctor?”  This simply statement stuck in his head like a mantra.

Back at the hospital that evening, he was met by a nurse who said:  “It’s been a very boring evening, but it looks as if there’s a woman down the corridor who’ll need help soon,” and he was really struck by the contrast between the beautiful, natural delivery he had just attended, and the fact that in the hospital it was considered boring unless there was an intervention.

Dick-Reed had seen many women having painful births which contrasted so strongly with the natural delivery he had attended, and he puzzled why it should be so.  Eventually he came up with the theory that the root of the problem was fear.  Because of fear, the muscles tense up, and the natural process of birth is inhibited, so it becomes less efficient, longer and, therefore, painful.

At the end of his career he wrote a seminal book on natural birth, ‘Childbirth Without Fear’, and the principals he propounded still hold good today.  The research into how the hormones work in pregnancy was not done until after he had finished his career but, in due course, his theory was fully vindicated. 

Since Dick-Reed’s time, the principles have been developed further, most notably by HypnoBirthing, the leading method of childbirth education today, which will not doubt be developed further over the years ahead.

I recently received the following in an email from a man seeking help in his marriage…

“Hi Calle,

Can you help me put my marriage back together?  Here are the details of my situation:

·         We’ve been married for 11 years but we have now been separated for about 4.5 months, living in separate houses about 30 minutes away from each other.

·         We have two children, ages 4 and 6.

·         No sex since our 4 year old son was conceived.  The very last time we had sex was a few months after my son was born, so that would have been probably January or February of 2005. So nearly 4 years. However, on that one occasion, it was terribly physically painful for her even though she was “ready”… I assume because of recently having the baby, or being newly sewn up after some tearing during delivery. In any case, she actually cried so we stopped. The last time before that was when our son was conceived. So about 4 years and 11 months ago. That particular time was after a long time of neglect on her part, and she suddenly, basically attacked me. We didn’t even go get any birth control because it had been so long for me that was the last thing on my mind. And I guess for her, it was just too urgent to worry about that. Well, needless to say, my son was a direct result of that encounter.

·         My wife suggested separate houses. And strangely she was the one who also suggested that we go on weekly dates. Still can’t really figure that one out.

·         She tells me that she thinks about cheating on a daily basis.  For example, we had just finished a date, where we played tennis. Then she asked me to go with her on an errand to Target. In the car on the way back I told her that I got a sense that she felt there was some sort of rush, so I asked her who or what was making her feel rushed, if anything. That’s when she told me that she had reached her sexual prime, and that she was basically constantly thinking about cheating on me.

·         She tells me that if I ever touch her she cringes inside.

·         She says she doesn’t know why she’s not sexually attracted to me anymore, like she used to be.

·         She told me late last night that she has made up her mind to file for divorce in January. She originally told me she wanted a divorce last February, a few days after my birthday and two days after my last grandparent’s funeral. After about a month of doing all the wrong stuff (i.e. begging, pleading, etc.) she finally agreed to separation instead, to see if things could improve. So from February to July we lived in the same house and actually even slept in the same bed (even though I told her I’d be fine with sleeping on the couch) until we moved to a different state. At that time we moved into separate households, her to her Mom’s house, and me to my Mom’s house.

·         Sometimes I get a response.  There have been several times where she’s allowed some affectionate touch. For example, one night while we were talking about politics, she let me tickle her back, and then she let me run my fingers through her hair and sort of a light scalp massage. While I was running fingers through her hair, she was hip to hip with me, turned and looking right into my eyes while we talked, smiling the whole time. A far cry from what she told me last night, which was that any time I touch her, she cringes inside.

·         She agreed to see a marriage and family counselor, only on the premise of helping us handle things with the kids better.  The counseling quickly turned to focusing on the marriage, in an attempt to rebuild the marriage in hopes of reconciliation.  We continued to see a marriage counselor upon arriving in the new state, but after only 6 sessions my wife said she no longer wanted to go to couples counseling.

·         Long before moving to the new state, during a counseling session my wife suggested that we go on weekly dates once we arrived in the new state. Both the counselor and I were surprised by this, but obviously I agreed to that, and figured it was nothing but a positive thing.  It had also come to our attention in counseling that she pursued me fully at the beginning of our relationship (kissed me first, asked me out on two dates before I asked her out, said “I love you” first, said she wanted to marry me first, had a date for marriage first even before I knew that I wanted to marry her, after marriage she decided when it was time for our first child, our second child was conceived after she basically attacked me after having neglected the sexual relationship for quite some time.)

·         We still go on a weekly date whenever possible. However, she has been out of town a lot of weekends with her Mother and other friends living it up.

·         I am currently only employed part-time, out of my industry. This is partly due to the fact that I had been at home raising my kids during the past two years, while my wife attended graduate school. I am a graphic designer, so I freelanced from home to make enough for us to get by. Then with the move to the new state, that took a huge toll on my freelance so I am now working nights just to make ends meet, while still trying to find a full-time design job and/or freelance projects. I tell you all of these details because I am wondering if you think it will be simply impossible for her to respect me until I find something full-time in graphic design. Or perhaps some other way to make the same money as I was making before, when my wife was at home full-time with the kids and I was working in a design studio. I am doing my best, but I often sense that this may be a deal breaker for her. The irony is that I was supporting the family by myself until I quit my job to move to another state for my wife to attend school. But I know her mind is not focused on that. Only that currently it has been very difficult for me to find work.

·         I should mention that she had been sexually abused at around the age of 5 by her Mother’s live-in boyfriend.

·         She had mentioned to my daughter that part of why she wanted the separation was to see if she would miss me. I don’t feel like because of our situation, she’s ever even had the chance to miss me. I think somehow she needs that. It also came out in counseling that she thrives on pursuing (like she pursued me during our courtship) even though right now she is retreating.

·         She had told me that she is realizing that she is at her sexual peak (she is 31 yrs. old, so it’s typically known for women to peak around that age range.)

·         She also has started drinking, which is against our religious beliefs, and which she hasn’t done since she was a teenager.

·         She stopped wearing her ring from the time she said she wanted a divorce.

·         She used to have only plain white panties, but last week I noticed that she has new colored, sexy panties. (Only from seeing them peek out the top of her pants.)

·         Obviously all of these above things show that she is ready and willing to cheat.

·         However, my confidence and true personality are back so strongly, that honestly I am not worried about my reaction or feelings if she chooses to cheat. I realize that the underlying reason she’d likely be doing that is as an attempt at achieving emotional intimacy. However, I am worried that she’d feel so guilty that even though I feel I could forgive her, I don’t think she could forgive herself. I think that guilt would keep her from any chance of reconciliation.

·         By the way, my religious beliefs prevent me from dating anyone else during the separation (as the book suggests for the 30 day no-contact period.)

·         it has come out in our counseling sessions that the times in our sex life when the sex was fantastic were all the times when she initiated it. Whenever I initiated sex, by and large it was not a positive experience for her. The counselors have said that this is basically because of the abuse that occurred in her childhood. Do I still try to initiate sex? Or do I wait for her to do so? I have concerns that if I initiate it, she will feel pressured, pursued and possibly even controlled. And if I don’t initiate it, I am pretty sure she probably never will. I would really appreciate some guidance on this.

Sincerely,

X”

Following is the response I sent back…

“Hi X,

If you don’t want to know what the most probable “truth” is, then STOP READING right now and immediately delete this email.  Otherwise, here’s just a few of the things my experience in helping a whole lot of men tells me…

1.      It’s possible your case is an exception but in all the other cases I’ve encountered where the woman has been non-sexual for an extended period of time…then initiates a sudden, one-time, “we’ve got to have sex now” fling…and birth-control is avoided in one way or another…and then a couple of weeks later “pops” the news that she’s pregnant…well, the fact was, she was ALREADY pregnant – usually from having an extended affair – and she needed a quick “encounter” to hide that…and a DNA-test eventually proved that out.

2.      Now, whether this is true or not, please don’t let this change or alter your feelings for the child because this boy desperately needs and wants your love regardless of who sired him.  As far as the child is concerned, YOU are his Dad and he doesn’t want any other Dad.

3.      But, as it pertains to you, you really need to be aware of the highly probably “truth”.

4.      This also supports why your wife doesn’t have “feelings” for you like she used to.

5.      The odd thing is, men have the reputation of being the sexual ones but in reality, experience has proven to me that many men will go sometimes for years without sex as they “hang” on to their so-called “marriage”.  In contrast, very few women will go for an extended period of time without sex.  She’ll either initiate a divorce quickly, or she’ll find another man outside of the marriage…play that hidden game for some period of time…and then begin the process of dissolving the marriage.  Again, your case may be an exception but it is an EXTREMELY RARE woman who will go for nearly 5 years without sex.  It’s my opinion that a big reason for this is that a man can “survive” on masturbation for an extended period of time whereas a woman needs more than masturbation can give her – and that’s why she sooner or later finds a sex-partner.

6.      Women and cats can be two of the meanest, most devious creatures on God’s green earth…and your estranged “wife” IS playing you for the fool and having fun at your expense doing it.  Your wife has no care for you.  She has no feelings for you.  Believe it or not, you are nothing more than fun and entertainment for her – at your expense:

a.               She keeps tabs on you for the perverted enjoyment of knowing that your life is miserable while she “lives it up”.

b.               She wants weekly dates just for the perverted fun of seeing that she can still control you.

c.                She strings you along (politics night) just so she can feel her perverted sense of power over you.

d.               She throws jabs at you such as “thinking about cheating” just for the perverted pleasure of watching you squirm in anguish.

7.      Now, what WILL happen at some point is she’ll realize that you have zero masculinity, that there is no depth of degradation you’re unwilling to stoop to for her and the moment she realizes this is the moment she’ll cut you out of her life as completely and permanently as possible.  When a woman reaches this point, she’d rather sleep with a NASTY DIAPER than the EMASCULATED man who used to be her husband.

8.      You’ve LET your wife EMASCULATE you…a woman cannot remain attracted to a man that she controls and directs.  From your statements, your wife has been controlling and directing you from the very beginning – which is why the sex disappeared long ago – which is why she most likely has been pursuing other men – or at the very least is ready to pursue them now.

9.      There is NO pot of sexual gold at the end of the “self-subverting, self-sacrificing” rainbow.  When you say things like, “honestly I am not worried about my reaction or feelings if she chooses to cheat” you’re just proving that you’re not man enough to stand up for yourself and what you want and that people can walk on you and trample you at will.

Ok, is there any hope for your marriage?

There’s a lot of territory that could be covered here but I’ll GIVE you the following:

1.                The process a woman (and a man for that matter) goes through to “fall out of love” is this:

a.               She mentally dismisses or minimizes all the good and pleasant memories and experiences she’s had with her husband.

b.               She mentally dwells upon and maximizes ALL the bad and unpleasant memories and experiences she’s had with her husband.

c.                She imagines a wonderful, happy future with ANOTHER man.

d.               She repeats steps A through C until she reaches a threshold where she’s totally disgusted by her husband

e.               Now, it’s merely a process of eliminating her husband from her life so that she can be “happy” with a new man.

2.                I suggest that you seriously consider whether God is trying to give you a better wife.  Pull out your Bible and read Ecclesiastes 7:26, “And I find more bitter than death the woman, whose heart is snares and nets, and her hands as bands: whoso pleaseth God shall ESCAPE from her”.  Consider also Matthew 19:6, “What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” And that the inverse is also true, what God has let be put asunder, don’t try to rejoin.  Related to that is 1 Corinthians 7:15, “But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases”.  Pray about this for yourself…it may be that you need to go through the “falling out of love” process for yourself.

3.                But, if you’re bound and determined to try to reconcile, then here is your only hope:

a.               Do your best to REVERSE the “falling out of love process” in HER mind.  Say things that cause her to remember when she first fell in love with you.  Say and do things that help her imagine and re-experience those feelings.  Say and do things that help her move into that “first love” state of mind.  Every chance you get, describe in as much detail as you can – using as many of the senses as you can in describing – all the good and pleasant memories and experiences you’ve had together.  Similarly, at the right time, you acknowledge the bad and unpleasant and then minimize it and counter-balance it with good.  Basically, the process that’s going through YOUR head right now is the process that you want to attempt to get going in HER head.

b.               You’ve got to immediately become the most masculine man your wife knows.  A mare NEVER controls or dominates a STALLION.  Look at nature’s examples of male behavior in the animal kingdom.  You’ll get the right ideas.

c.                By demonstration, your wife must immediately become aware that she CANNOT control or dominate you – that you are your own independent MAN.

d.               Your wife must see that good times and good experiences are enjoyed by those who YOU accept into your world and that you ONLY allow quality people within your world.

May God help and bless you and take you to your highest good.

Warmly,

Calle”

Mr. X then sent back this reply…

“Hi Calle,

Wow! This was eye opening! I really appreciate what you’ve told me here. I am not sure about my son really being my son, but I will be getting a DNA test as soon as possible. I’ll never tell him if he’s not mine, but I need to know. I’ll confront my wife if he’s not mine. And of course I’ll let you know the results as well.

I will take everything you’ve said to heart, and depending on the DNA results, try to do the steps for reconciliation. It may be too late, but I have to give it a shot. I appreciate your comments about the possibility of God giving me a better wife. I am totally open-minded to that as a real possibility. However, to have a clear conscience before God and my children, I need to exhaust all resources before calling it quits even though she has said she is done. Then if she goes through with divorce as she says, I will eventually be open to another wife who is less controlling, more kind and devoted, etc.

The process of falling out of love is EXACTLY as things have happened with us. She was diagnosed with clinical depression shortly after we were married, so I think that has played a factor in minimizing the positives and maximizing the negatives.

It all makes perfect sense to me now. And to think all along, I thought I was being such a good husband for being such a nice guy, and trying so hard to please her. I wish every newlywed man could read this.

I hope this info is not too late for me and my family. I sincerely appreciate your generosity and time! I will eventually buy all your books when I can afford it. For either this marriage or the next, if it comes to that.

Sincerely,

X”

Copyright 2008, Article by Calle Zorro of NymphomaniacWife.com. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to the following website is included with it.

For A Balanced Lifestyle

“When the going gets tough, the tough get going”

Write this old, but still very true, quote down on a 3” x 4” file card and stick it on your bathroom mirror, fridge or someplace in your home that forces you to see it everyday.  Read it when you get up in the morning and when you go to bed at night.

Visualization of this quote everyday will give you strength to motivate you in your current business or to find a new business career in these recessionary times.  Don’t underestimate the power of creative dreaming or visualization.  Most of the best inventions in life came from people who were not afraid to dream big.

Successful people have mistakes and failures, but they never loose vision of the goal they have set in their mind to achieve.  They learn from their mistakes and push forward towards their goal.  Goal oriented people become aware of how powerful the force of dreams and desires are.

Take steps to develop these skills beginning in very small ways everyday.  You have to own your dreams or desires.  Set one or more manageable goals to accomplish everyday.  At the end of the day, week and finally the month, you will be amazed at what you have accomplished.  The feeling of pride you get from each achievement will keep increasing your energy level to continue accomplishing even more goals.  You now have created a road map to achieve success.

Mine your dreams and desires.  Don’t let setbacks or negative comments bug you.  Pay attention to your dreams, fantasies and desires.  Face the fears and challenges that have caused you to stop mining those treasures, the treasures that can give you the life you deserve.  Think about it, avoidance is really not helping anything.  You still expend a great deal of energy on the negative feelings of pain, frustration, guilt and hurt.  Remember, “avoidance always prolongs the pain”.

Successful people always keep their vision on the larger picture, constantly taking steps to achieve their goal.  They constantly visualize the steps they must take to attain the good things they want in life and to avoid the bad things that will hinder them from accomplishing their goals.  In short, they rarely do anything without thinking positively about the rewards of their goal and how it will enhance their life.

Successful people don’t dwell on blame or fault.  Even if someone else is at fault, they take the initiative to address the problem and seek a solution.  Whatever the answer may be, they don’t loose sight of their goal.  Don’t just sit there wishing someone would fix the problem, it’s your goals at risk, you fix it.

We know the economy is currently in a recession.  Don’t wait for it to change take action now.  Take up a new skill, change your career, and look at a different field of employment.  Look somewhere else to find another career, find a niche that is hot, enlarge your network of searches, and be open to new job or career opportunities.  Read the newspaper, entrepreneur magazines, start thinking outside the box.  What have you always dreamt about doing?  Don’t just sit around and wait.   

Force yourself out of your comfort zone.  Nothing will happen unless you get started taking action now.  Start off by taking baby steps; this will decrease your setbacks while building your confidence. 

“If an ant picks up one grain of sand at a time, the city will still be built.  But if the ant looks at the grain of sand and says this is not a city; there will be

no city at the end.”

If you are looking for an Easy to Read Information packed ebook to Gain A Healthy Well-Balanced Lifestyle, go to www.wellbalancedlifestyle.com

Holiday Inn Killarney is one of the most famous hotel and one of the best Three Star hotels worldwide. It is the identical hotel of most Holiday Inn branched-out around the world that sustains best facilities and accommodation. Its expertise of a good hotel and customer service makes Holiday Inn to be recognized for its survival in this line of industry. The construction of Holiday Inn, Killarney seems like a legacy for their length of service that will prolong its service until generations. The grandees Holiday Inn Hotel is located in Muckross Road, Killarney Ireland.

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Crab like Karka ( Cancer ) rashi lives in water and represents the chest of Kaal Purusha (Ursha major). It moves in Agricultural lands, waterbodies, riversides and picturesque places.]

The fourth sign in the Rashichakra, Karka ( Cancer ) love their home — their roots. Falling in the fourth house of the Kaalpurusha (Ursha Major), which denotes mother, Karka ( Cancer ) plays the same role. Farther the governing planet of the Rashi is Chandra (Moon), which rules over themind and denotes mother. This too enhances its role as mother The most empathetic zodiac sign, Karkas ( Cancer ) are often overly sensitive. They take great pleasure in the comforts of home and family and are at their best when all is peaceful at this front.

Karkas ( Cancer ) are more concerned with expressing emotions than on superficial conversations. They can appear to be moody, shy and too much like a baby. But on the contrary they are not shy, but protecting themselves against emotional exposure. Though very artistic and creative, often they get on the nerves for holding on to everything including wealth and even to every word that was ever said to them. Their mood swings are unpredictable — sweet to cranky. The proverbial crab, they retreat into their shells, when hurt.

They nurture a maternal instinct, are domestic and love to nurture others. They adore large families, always providing for others, protecting and making a nest wherever they go. Karkas ( Cancer ) are traditional and prize family history and love communal activities. They also tend to be patriotic, waving the flag, whenever possible.

Extremely introvert and certainly not the easiest person to understand these crabs can hide emotions well beneath the tough exterior. Although kind and affable till the mood is stable, it is bitter and melancholic at the next, often feeling hurt unnecessarily. Trying to draw sympathy, Crabs can be fairly insensitive towards others, snapping, being rude and short-tempered. However, the seemingly rude behavior is only a clever means to hide their own insecurities and complexes — almost like timid, hurt children. Karkas ( Cancer ) can be admirably kind, generous, understanding, charitable and gracious, if all is well with them.

Most often crabs hurt the ones most who have been good for them. They also tend to make a mountain out of the molehill and are prone to self-pity. Slightly untidy, this doesn’t endear you to more stable signs. Unlike Dhanu, who have a place for everything, the Karkas ( Cancer ) idea is to put it somewhere, under the bed, in cupboards, anywhere — not that you are not untidy — you are the original hoarder. Karkas ( Cancer ) don’t ask for much either, a comfortable home and sense of peace is what is most important. Crabs are also quick to help others and tend to avoid confrontation. In keeping with their nurturing bent, those born under this Sign enjoy their food. A hearty picnic in the park is heaven on earth to most crabs.

Karkas ( Cancer ) can be seen standing by people in their time of need. Their good intuitive powers mostly put to good use in managing their own lives. Urges to travel to distant lands come but quelled since home is where you love to dwell.

Karkas ( Cancer ) have a keen intellect and are good with their hands. They do well as painters, sculptors sales persons. However you are best when it comes to taking writing as a full-time profession. Most crabs will have reasonably good careers, although there will be a tendency to change to an entirely different field midway, say somewhat nearing 35 years. Money and material wealth are fairly important to and although nearly miserly with the money you earn, sudden windfalls and gains are often squandered away thoughtlessly.

Crabs romance those who are quite opposite to them in nature. They are strongly attracted to people who are confident, strong and successful. Although they fall in love all the time, their introvert nature and uneasiness in disclosing youre their true feelings makes many of these affairs one-sided. they are not likely to rush headlong into marriage, because in selecting a life partner, they are often governed by your their. Karkas ( Cancer ), Vrischika ( Scorpio ) and Meen ( Pisces ) will make good partners for Karkas ( Cancer ).